Bumper Stickers...

[MBrevard]

Bumper Stickers You'll Probably Never See

I love animals, they taste great.
EARTH FIRST! We'll stripmine the other planets later.
"Very funny, Scotty. Now beam down my clothes."
Friends help you move. Real friends help you move bodies.
I'm as confused as a baby in a topless bar.
"Criminal Lawyer" is a redundancy.
Make it idiot proof and someone will make a better idiot.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
Sometimes I wake up grumpy; Other times I let him sleep
Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
A flashlight is a case for holding dead batteries.
Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
All generalizations are false, including this one.
Laugh alone and the world thinks you're an idiot.
Hard work has a future payoff. Laziness pays off now.
I won't rise to the occasion, but I'll slide over to it.
Consciousness: that annoying time between naps.
I don't suffer from insanity. I enjoy every minute of it.
Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
Forget about World Peace.....Visualize Using Your Turn Signal
Warning: Dates in Calendar are closer than they appear.
i Suport publik edducation
Okay, who put a "stop payment" on my reality check?
Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs.
We have enough youth, how about a fountain of SMART?
Cover me. I'm changing lanes.
Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

Anybody have any others?? :wink:

Love,
MB
xxx

[Chris]

A couple of genuine ones:

Mine reads: Get Revenge, Sh*t on a pigeon!

have also seen:

If you can read this, who the hell nicked my caravan?


And recently saw one on the back of a motorcyclists jackets which read:

If you can read this, the wife wasn't holding on properly!

[Asha]

Like some of them a lot, try these on for size:

Get in, Sit down, Shut up HANG ON

Don't Worry! We're from the Government. You're Safe Now!

Relax! Youll Get There.

I THINK THEREFORE IM DANGEROUS

Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did. Only Backwards and in High-Heels

I do whatever the deities in my head tell me to....

there are 10 types of people: those who understand binary and those who don't

Never drive faster then your angel can fly

I'm only driving because my dragon is tired

Everything that s*cks is not necessarily bad *vampire*

Did you ever stop and think....and forget to start again?

I live in another dimension, but i have a summer home in reality

Everything I like is either immoral, Illegal or fattening

I'm always in trouble but it is soooo much fun

Once you have pulled the pin from Mr. Grenade, he's no llonger your friend

I'm not obnoxious, I'm tact challenged

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot changes, the courage to change the things I can, and the weaponry to make all the difference

Psychoamazonwarbitch from Hell with an Attitude

If I could get a grip on reality, I'd choke it

I love my country, it's the government I fear

Against Abortion, have a Vasectomy

Back Off!! I'm a Goddess

My Karma just ran over your dogma

My other car is a broom

Well, my longest post to date, :lol: :lol:

Have fun
Asha

[Wild_Honey]

I THINK I have some more; but forgive me if I have some repeats in there. :wink:



- Lost your cat? Try looking under my tyres!

- I am not drunk! That's the usual way I drive!

- No reason to live but I like it that way.

- I love cats! They taste like chicken!

- Join the Army! Travel around, see many places, meet nice people and kill them.



*********************************************
"I'd lie for you - and that's the truth..."
*********************************************

[heat]

Best one i ever saw was


'Jesus loves you...but everyone else thinks you're a C**T'!!!!!!

It amused me.... :lol: :lol: :lol:

[R.]

If you can read this, the wife wasn't holding on properly!
This is a little bit different - it's a T shirt and looks like this:
http://www.humor911.com/pub/innslag/bilder/661.jpg
:))

[Testify]

hehe nice one!! :mrgreen: :lol:

[Wild_Honey]

- Whoops! …Was that YOUR cat!?

- F*** you you f***in’ f***!

- Two things are endless: The universe and human stupidity, but I am not yet sure about the universe… (Albert Einstein) :mrgreen:

- I just drive like that in order to get on your nerves.

- Same shit – different day

- If you come any closer, please introduce yourself!

- You may be much faster than me… but I am driving in FRONT of you!

- Jesus is coming – look busy!

[heat]

Here's a couple more...

Jesus saves.......Greenshield stamps

I am woman, don't give me sh it

If you think i'm a bitch, you obviously haven't met my mother

The only reason men were invented is because dildo's can't get the drinks in

[MBrevard]

Hope there aren't too many reruns in these:

Honk if you've never seen an Uzi fired from a car window.
If you can beat me, you can eat me! (seen on a Corvette driven by a "drop-dead gorgeous blonde")
Remember: Stop lights timed for 35mph are also timed for 70mph.
GUYS: No shirt, no service. GALS: No shirt, no charge.
Heart Attacks...God's Revenge For Eating His Animal Friends
Boldly going nowhere.
Cat: The other white meat.
Eat Well, Stay Fit, Die Anyway
He's not dead, He's electro-encephalographically challenged
If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you
If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, riddle them with bullets
If you lived in your car, you'd be home by now
WARNING! Driver only carries $20.00 in ammunition

:lol:

Love,
MB
xxx

[Testify]

:lmao:

[heat]

Saw this one on ebay

And on the 8th day, God created....Meat Loaf!!!!


:lol: :lol: :lol:

[Testify]

nice one!! :lol:

[MBrevard]

Ah, Heat I want THAT one!!!! :bunny:

Love,
MB
xxx

[Testify]

if i had a car i would have that!!

this gives me an idea!! :twisted: always thought my mums car looked abit plain just bein white!! hehehehehe :twisted:

[Wild_Honey]

Here's some more. :wink:

- I think, therefore I am not you.

- If cats could talk, they wouldn't.

- If God is within I hope He likes Enchiladas.

- It's not dying that bothers me. It's the not being here anymore.

- The older I get, the better I was.

- The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese!

- When your only tool is a hammer, all problems start to look like nails.

[MBrevard]

Oh, I LOVE those, Wild_Honey!! Thanks for sharing them!

Got my morning off to a great start!!! :D

Love,
MB
xxx

[Asha]

Nice ones, I love the one about Meat, I have to have that on my car :lol:
Asha

[aussielovesmeat]

Saw this one the other day, my other half wasn't amused, but it cracked me up completely :lmao:

All Men Are Idiots.......and I Married their King

[heat]

That is sooo true - if you got the king, i certianly got his bloody jester..... 8O

[aussielovesmeat]

Good one Heat....... :lmao:

[Asha]

:lmao:

Thx Heat, for cracking me up...

Asha

[R.]

Certainly off topic (http://www.mlukfc.com/forums/showthread.php?t=199) ... But just a little bit. :p

[Asha]

R. are you a Turkey, or do you have a Bumper Dumper?!

:lol: :lol: 8) :lol: :lol:

Asha

[heat]

I'd say R. has a Bumper Dumper :D :twisted:

Me, just call me turkey...... :P

[R.]

My car hasn't got a bumper for that .

[heat]

My car hasn't got a bumper for that .

a likely story.... :lol:

Sounds like you is in Bumper-dumper denial 8O

But it's ok, R.....i won't tell anyone... :twisted:

[Asha]

:lol: 8)

Me I'm a turkey :lol

[MBrevard]

Hey, R. That guy is serious!! He's honestly selling those things!! :roll: Isn't the Internet wonderful??!!

Here are a few more bumper stickers. Hope there aren't too many reruns:
The two most common elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.

Money can't buy happiness... but it sure makes misery easier to live with.

Deja Moo: the feeling that you've heard this bullshit before.

Psychiatrists say that one out of four people are mentally ill. Check three friends. If they're ok...

Nothing in the known universe travels faster than a bad check.

A truly wise man never plays leapfrog with a unicorn.

It has recently been discovered that research causes cancer in laboratory rats.

It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

Paranoids are people too. They have their own problems. It's easy to criticize, but if everybody hated you, you'd be paranoid too.

Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence on society.

Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving from where you left them to where you can't find them.

Law of Probability Dispersal: Whatever it is that hits the fan will NOT be evenly distributed.

Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn.

The trouble with doing something right the first time is that nobody appreciates how difficult it was.

If you are given on open-book exam, you will forget your book.

COROLLARY: If you are given a take-home test, you will forget where you live.

Paul's Law: You can't fall off the floor.

A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell and make you feel happy to be on your way.

Vital papers will demonstrate their vitality by moving from where you left them to where you can't find them.

Supplement: A .44 Magnum beats four aces.

:mrgreen:

Love,
MB
xxx