Monstro
31 Mar 2007, 12:51
Friend of mine sent me this transcript of a help line telephone conversation....
Subject: CUSTOMER SERVICE CALL
>
>
>
> This has got to be one of the funniest things I've
> heard of in a long time. I think this guy should
> have been promoted, not fired.
>
>
>
> This is a true phone call from the Word Perfect Help
> Line which was transcribed from a recording
> monitoring the customer care. Needless to say the
> Help Desk employee was fired; he/she is currently
> suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination
> without Cause."
>
>
>
> This is actual dialogue of a former Word Perfect
> Customer Support.
>
>
>
>
>
> Now I know why they record these conversations!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> "Ridge Hall computer assistance; May I help you?"
>
>
>
> "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with Word Perfect."
>
>
>
> "What sort of trouble?"
>
>
>
> "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden
> the words went away."
>
>
>
> "Went away?"
>
>
>
> "They disappeared."
>
>
>
> "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
>
>
>
> "Nothing."
>
>
>
> "Nothing?"
>
>
>
> "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
>
>
>
> "Are you still in Word Perfect, or did you get out?"
>
>
>
> "How do I tell?"
>
>
>
> "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
>
>
>
> "What's a sea-prompt?"
>
>
>
> "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the
> screen?"
>
>
>
> "There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept
> anything I type."
>
>
>
> "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
>
>
>
> "What's a monitor?"
>
>
>
> "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks
> like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells
> you when it's on? "I don't know."
>
>
>
> "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find
> where the power cord goes into it. Can you see
> that?"
>
>
>
> "Yes, I think so."
>
>
>
> "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if
> it's plugged into the wall."
>
>
>
> "Yes, it is."
>
>
>
> "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice
> that there were two cables plugged into the back of
> it, not just one?"
>
>
>
> "No."
>
>
>
> "Well, there are. I need you to look back there
> again and find the other cable."
>
>
>
> "Okay, here it is."
>
>
>
> "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged
> securely into the back of your computer."
>
>
>
> "I can't reach."
>
>
>
> "Uh huh. Well , can you see if it is?"
>
>
>
> "No."
>
>
>
> "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and
> lean way over?"
>
>
>
> "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right
> angle--it's because it's dark."
>
>
>
> "Dark?"
>
>
>
> "Yes, the office light is off, and the only light I
> have is coming in from the window."
>
>
>
> "Well, turn on the office light then."
>
>
>
> "I can't."
>
>
>
> "No? Why not?"
>
>
>
> "Because there's a power failure."
>
>
>
> "A power.... A power failure? Aha, okay, we've got it
> licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals
> and packing stuff your computer came in?"
>
>
>
> "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
>
>
>
> "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack
> it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it
> back to the store you bought it from."
>
>
>
> "Really? Is it that bad?"
>
>
>
> "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
>
>
>
> "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell
> them?"
>
>
>
> "Tell them you're too ****ing stupid to own a
> computer."
Subject: CUSTOMER SERVICE CALL
>
>
>
> This has got to be one of the funniest things I've
> heard of in a long time. I think this guy should
> have been promoted, not fired.
>
>
>
> This is a true phone call from the Word Perfect Help
> Line which was transcribed from a recording
> monitoring the customer care. Needless to say the
> Help Desk employee was fired; he/she is currently
> suing the Word Perfect organization for "Termination
> without Cause."
>
>
>
> This is actual dialogue of a former Word Perfect
> Customer Support.
>
>
>
>
>
> Now I know why they record these conversations!
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
>
> "Ridge Hall computer assistance; May I help you?"
>
>
>
> "Yes, well, I'm having trouble with Word Perfect."
>
>
>
> "What sort of trouble?"
>
>
>
> "Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden
> the words went away."
>
>
>
> "Went away?"
>
>
>
> "They disappeared."
>
>
>
> "Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"
>
>
>
> "Nothing."
>
>
>
> "Nothing?"
>
>
>
> "It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."
>
>
>
> "Are you still in Word Perfect, or did you get out?"
>
>
>
> "How do I tell?"
>
>
>
> "Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
>
>
>
> "What's a sea-prompt?"
>
>
>
> "Never mind, can you move your cursor around the
> screen?"
>
>
>
> "There isn't any cursor; I told you, it won't accept
> anything I type."
>
>
>
> "Does your monitor have a power indicator?"
>
>
>
> "What's a monitor?"
>
>
>
> "It's the thing with the screen on it that looks
> like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells
> you when it's on? "I don't know."
>
>
>
> "Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find
> where the power cord goes into it. Can you see
> that?"
>
>
>
> "Yes, I think so."
>
>
>
> "Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if
> it's plugged into the wall."
>
>
>
> "Yes, it is."
>
>
>
> "When you were behind the monitor, did you notice
> that there were two cables plugged into the back of
> it, not just one?"
>
>
>
> "No."
>
>
>
> "Well, there are. I need you to look back there
> again and find the other cable."
>
>
>
> "Okay, here it is."
>
>
>
> "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged
> securely into the back of your computer."
>
>
>
> "I can't reach."
>
>
>
> "Uh huh. Well , can you see if it is?"
>
>
>
> "No."
>
>
>
> "Even if you maybe put your knee on something and
> lean way over?"
>
>
>
> "Oh, it's not because I don't have the right
> angle--it's because it's dark."
>
>
>
> "Dark?"
>
>
>
> "Yes, the office light is off, and the only light I
> have is coming in from the window."
>
>
>
> "Well, turn on the office light then."
>
>
>
> "I can't."
>
>
>
> "No? Why not?"
>
>
>
> "Because there's a power failure."
>
>
>
> "A power.... A power failure? Aha, okay, we've got it
> licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals
> and packing stuff your computer came in?"
>
>
>
> "Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."
>
>
>
> "Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack
> it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it
> back to the store you bought it from."
>
>
>
> "Really? Is it that bad?"
>
>
>
> "Yes, I'm afraid it is."
>
>
>
> "Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell
> them?"
>
>
>
> "Tell them you're too ****ing stupid to own a
> computer."