I'm just going to stick to using the bat phone from now on :))

Can't go wrong love

Are you kidding? If it was me...charges would have been reversed!!! ;)

Ok it was me. Still there was no reason to be so rude. I didn't realise just how many times you can use the f word in one sentance!
200th post get in. :D

Congrats!!!

OK...NOW it's May???

It can't have been you ... I don't do repetition when I'm swearing at cold call salesmen :))

:lol:

Off tomorrow :D

Oh sweet mother of god this ain't good!!

A couple of ill placed comments over a pint in a pub and my cunning plan to score via a cliff concert has made it to a newspaper!!!

I'm dead when she sees it

Chris you do seem to have a gift for, quite literally, hitting the headlines with your chosen ladies...interesting...

This was entirely my fault - i got terribly indiscreet whilst drunk and forgot totally who was there hanging on every word!!

Oh well, Emmerdale Christmas party ina weeks time so i can try and pull another famous soapstar there!!

Nothing like a bit of name dropping, eh Chris ;)

I am STARVING...and I already ate my breakfast and lunch...and there is no food in this office left...

And there is still over an hour until I get home...argh...

There's a funny smell in here ... perhaps it could be the dog who's let off ... ;-)

:wtf:

Boycott Shampoo
Demand the real thing.


I sw that on a sign this morning sdriving to work and have been chuckling about it ever since!

What is the real thing then?

I recently had a privilege to stay in the hotel where shampoo and body wash was the same thing...:shock:

Is that something like that???

I think not, it's not Scrabs...

Well, it wasn't me :shock:

All I said was it wasn't Scrabble.... ;)

think it must be the cows ...

Girls don't do that

That was the breed, not the gender :lmao:

Noo it was the gender because cows are girls....if that was the breed then what are girl cows called?!!

Actually if it had been the breed it would have been Friesan or Highland. Cow is a generic, common usage term for the species.

You said it was the breed, not me Mister!!!

So on your theory, girl cows are cows, and boy cows are bulls...this is too much for me

But I did correct my mistake in public ...

:bicker::bicker::bicker::bicker::bicker::bicker::bicker::bicker::bicke r::bicker::bicker::bicker::bicker::bicker::bicker::bicker::roll::roll: :roll::roll::roll::roll::roll:

If any of you read the HM gossip email, the cliff story is the one I got into bother with the lasss over.

Quick, somebody frame that post!

How hot does it have to get to fry brains?

No wait! One would need brains to do that, wouldn't one?

Quick, edit that post :lmao:

I can still smell that smell...

Still off :D

The current pain in the neck is only marginally better than the current pain in the back.

But both are a pain in the arse and shouldn't be there

:(god I could cry...

How very true ... wonder if the Osteopath can cure both?

I know how to cure one :roll:

Actuall no.

Girl cows are heifers.
Boy cows are bulls.


Its like how all female birds regardless of species are called hens whereas all male birds regardless of species are called cocks.

Speaks volumes

According to the letter, next years training away day takes place at the IBM Manchester Office.

The only slight hitch being IBM don't have a Manchester office!

And apparently they do have a manchester office - the man at the york office was merely trying (and succeeding) at confusing me!

Argh...

I want one of these new driving licences.

You know, the ones that let you drive without lights, mirrors or signalling. And they confer on the owner the right to ignore red lights, not give way to the right ona roundabout and generally drive like a stupid, pig ignorant dweeb!

I don't want THAT one...I want all those PIGS to have SUSPENDED licences...argh..

What do you do when you go to the ML unrelated show and are surrounded my ML tributes???

When are we going to have a rain-free day so I can hang out my washing:???:

Cant be bothered to revise

You need to revise or you will not do as well in your tests as you could do. Trust me, I've been there, done that, got the t-shirt. That's why I'm back as a student at 43 years of age. :shock:

I know i do but these are mock tests

I think I could get used to the therapy that the Osteopath recommended I utilised to ease my back problem...

What was it?
I get referred for massage for mine.

Some things are too precious to be shared ;-)

Nooo I think you should share with the group....

Sounds like something I've heard before...oh yes...ML song...

What do you mean American vending machine doesn't accept British coins??? :shock:

I hate work, god please let me win the lottery.

:twisted: You're damned if you don't, you're damned if you do, and either way, all you get is ear ache :bicker: :bicker: :bicker:

I'm just going to go head butt this wall for a few minutes.

Changed our DNS record and waited the requsite six hours for the change to propagate. Just realised I spelt it wrong so now need to wait another six hours before i can download the data i need.

But, I need it for a seminar tomorrow (E-commerce round table discussion) so it looks like i will be doing the report tonight when i get back from the pub. Oh Yippee :(

Soooooooo Hungry

Go eat :)

Cupboards empty i cant :(

i did my very best... still not taken to Spain :(

The world of non-illegal internet is so much faster :))

Welcome to our world

Chinese food :D

Sounds like somebody got a phone connected, eh?

My watch stopped earlier this evening, and I've only just realised it's far later than I thought it was! Best not make the phone calls I was planning on making now!!

Hey, it's only 7 pm here...;)

:( I have very deep veins. :(
Do you know how much harder that makes suicide? ;)

Off again :D

Earth...open up, and swallow me

When the earth opens up and swallows things, do you think it worries about calories?

it´s hard to see dear people dying, even if they´re old :(

I've got five presents under the tree adn i am not sure I can resist opening them until the 25th.

WE open them on the evening of the 24th:))

Are you adult or a child????? :roll:




































OPEN THEM!!! NOW!!!!!!!!!!!! :-)

We are allowed one before bed so as to stop my sister getting to excited (she is older than me).
Year before last we convinced her we weren't going to open them until after church at lunchtime - she nearly had a dicky fit!

Now there's a quesiton :lmao:

Now now...YOU I wouldn't have asked that same question...I know the answer to THAT one...

Under my tree it looks pretty pathetic. I box of aftereight's and a half ate box of quality street.
Actually that half box seems such a shame better go and finish it off.
Yea Newcastle have just scored as i wrote this. :D

I open presents as I receive them...and give them away as I buy them...thus...some of my friends received their Christmas presents sometime in August...argh...going shopping on Friday...now I have NO Christmas presents left!!!

Talking about child...

I never said who it was aimed at did I? :roll:

how about a poll
Is chris an adult of a child?:twisted:

:shock:

Have I been just moderated on my own thoughts???

In Post Your Thoughts thread???

:oops:

Most of the year i m a responsible adult.
At xmas I am a big kid. :twisted:

And why not if you can't act like a kid at this time of year when can you.
Although my wife say's i'm like a big kid all the time. :-P

Just finished work.
Now i have the rest of the day all to myself! :D

I'm going for allergy testing this afternoon... going to find out what foods I'm reacting to, and which I'm not having enough of....

I just KNOW I'm going to end up scratching my arms off...

Mental note: Remember to take some anti-histamines...

I'll put a fiver on chocolate and vodka being on the allergic to list ... good luck

:roll: Mmmm.... something tells me you're going to be right.... Well I won't especially miss the vodka, but if they put grapes and fermented grape products on the list, I'll be more than a little bit upset...

I'm hoping for broccoli and brussels sprouts to be on the list...

I am actually allergic to fermented grape products in color red...good luck!!!

Er.....no :shock:

ARRRRGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

I can't decide whether to return to my desk witha bottle of whiskey or a sub-machine gun.
Either way, someone is getting slaughtered this afternoon.

Why can't they just give me a bloody appointment now, rather than make me ring back at 2pm????

Think a cuppa is called is called for!

No matter how the figures are added up, they always come to three hundred and eighty one!

3 8 1 ....