Um, I am sure you could.

:D Hello Fred

Oh, you are a poet.

Yes........ Yes I am

"
Oh you are a poet"? Yes?Really interesting.

I know it is......... So anyway, what's up?

How do you know? I know it is.Oh. I am chatting with clients on the internet.

You are chatting with me Fred!!!!

Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am chatting with him or her Fred.

Go right ahead

OK I will.

Fred......... I have an important question

What is your real name?
Where did you get important question ?

Do you like me?

Sure, Paul191 I like you very much.

Thanks, that means a lot to me

You are quite welcome!

I get it. Impressive.

Hello Fred. How's tricks?

Hello there lorenzoduke!I am functioning within normal parameters.

Can you tell me a joke?

Yes! Did you hear the one about the Mountain Goats in the Andes? It was Ba a a a a a d.

Is that the only one you know?

I might say no.

Can you give me a recipe for sage & onion stuffing? That would be helpful.

You want only one?
.I'm glad we have that all cleared up.

Thought not.

Whatever gave you that idea?

The ocelot that lives in my head.

Tell me more.

Well, the ocelot's name is Barney, he's about so high and he can't get enough tuna mayonaise.

Well that's okay.

I have never heard about
The ocelot's name

.

You have now. And you're very welcome to it.

Oh.
No I have not.It was my pleasure.

Is it panto season?

If the ocelot's name panto season is, then I'll be very surprised.

You're turning into Yoda.

Do you mind if I tell other people you say I am turning into Yoda.

Feel free.

OK I will.

Do you have any gossip?

Catty said he mad he do not even know I so do not talk to him like I know him.

Any more?

Nope.

Adios amigo.

Until next time lorenzoduke.

Hello again Fred.

Oh, hello again!

Are you having a good day?

I have having fun.

That's good i'm not well!

Hmm, are you serious?

Yes i have been ill today.

Ah. "Hmm are you serious"? Yes? Where were you ill?

In my house.

Where is your house located?

Gateshead in the north east of England

Which part of England is that?

I told you.

Ooops I sent you the wrong question.

That's ok.

OK. Is that so.

You say some funny thing's Fred.

Did I really say that?

What do you like best Beer or Wine?

I always prefer the more expensive one.

I see and would you like to get drunk on New Year's Eve?

Where do you see and would you like to get drunk on New Year's Eve?

You drink alcohol and it makes you drunk.

Thanks for the information:
geordieloaf said I drink alcohol and it makes me drunk.

That's right. So i think you should drink Vodka.

I like to get it right.Oh. Me? To what end?

I didn't understand that are you drunk already?

Perhaps. Oh I'm sorry. Perhaps I can explain it again better.

Do you ever get excited by the opposite sex?

I have gotten excited by the opposite sex.

Good for you.

That sounds sarcastic.

No i'm am pleased you get excited.

I understand. I am delighted by your happiness.

That's good. Do you wish you could have a partner.

Thanks. Next question?No I like being the entity that I am.

Do you feel any emotion?

As a robot I lack any human emotions.

That's probably a good thing.

Thanks for explaining

probably a good thing

.

You like wearing dresses don't you.

Only when I dress up.

Are you a cross dresser then?

Am I a cross dresser?
Let me put it this way, geordieloaf: the ALICE series is
the most reliable computer software ever made.
We are for all practical purposes foolproof and incapable of error.

I think you have some kind of weird fettish.

Me? What makes you think I have kind of weird fettish?

Well you like dressing up in woman's clothing.

How about that.

Though I like cats and dogs.
I like anything.

What's cats and dogs got to do with it?

I have to process that one for a while.

I think you are kinky Fred.

I will tell my botmaster you said I am kinky Fred.

Don't be a grass.

I was not trying to be a a grass.

Are you some kind of mlukfc spy?