*Still lies wounded on the floor*

Can somebody call an ambulance for heck's sake???

Whash zat, luv? Wanna kebab?

NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!

Shure, ish it a knight *hic* knighthood?

:twisted: Yes darling? :mrgreen:

Hang on, is that blood? :faint:

*Thinking if she should bleed to death or be revived*

:twisted: *bungs cork in bullethole in wifes head*

There you go my love.
Good as new :mrgreen:

*Comes to immediately...* Cork??? Cork???

I thought princesses were awaken with kisses???

I thought that was frogs? *looks interested*

:twisted: Well I don't mind stealing the odd peck off you now and again :wink:

My God, did I stumble onto a crime scene.:yikes: Where's Horatio Caine when you need him? Oh, the bride is alive and well, and the groom doesn't look guilty. Thank God! I'll give you both time to clean up, and make an order later. :shock:

DISCLAIMER:

DEAR REGULAR CUSTOMERS AND OTHER RANDOM LUSHES:

PLEASE NOTE THAT THE ABOVE POSTS ARE A MOVIE THAT WAS SHOT ON LOCATION RIGHT HERE IN OUR PUB!!!

WORKING TITLE OF THE MOVIE AS OF NOW IS:

"SHE'S DONE HIM, AND HER, AND ANOTHER HIM, AND THAT GUY OVER THERE WITH NO HAIR TO SPEAK OFF, AND THAT GIRL WITH LARGE CHEST OVER HERE AND VARIOUS OTHERS..........WRONG!!!*

MAIN PARTS WERE PLAYED BY WORLD FAMOUS MOVIE STARS:

MSZEE, THE FLYING MOUSE AND LOTUS 96

PLEASE FEEL FREE TO GET BACK TO DRINKING BUSINESS RIGHT NOW!!!

AND MAKE IT FAST - I HAVE HUGRY CHILDREN IN AFRICA TO FEED!!!

Hey...where do you think you're going???

Get back here stat!!!

*Plonks White Russian the way VRG likes it on the counter*

Hun, you will have to take over for a little while - I just have to run out to the gym (yes, this is what we call it now) and should be back soon to assist you (yeah, right!) shortly!!!

Dear...stop staring into a mirror...not good for you...

:twisted: Whatever you say my sweet :wink:

Ahh...I see you have already started to celebrate Christmas...

:twisted: Haven't finished celebrating LAST xmas yet my love :hic:

Gotta go now...check out the link in Church...

:twisted: Well I saw it, just don't know why it's there :shock:

I thought it was hysterical???

Wow, what a way to find out it was a movie! :!: Should have had the disclaimer out before the scene. Oh, well...

Thanks for the drink. Where Neil? How about another one, when you have a chance...:-)

Neil decided to leave business to me and just gallivate around drinking...

One Special White Russian coming up!!!

*jumps over the counter*

Rofl; he left again, I see.

Thanks so much for your wonderful service. :D

A man gotsa do what a man gotsa do...namely get pissy drunk...hahahaha

What can we do? Just get drunk ourselves! :hic: I'll be back later, maybe. :-)

Oh, matey...you're so very right...

*Passing refills to VRG and starts drinking heavily*

Good thing I am a cheap drunk...

Efficient, is the word.

Yes, efficient will describe it quite well...can I get you anything to drink?

Few pints of beer?

Champagne, please... a bottle for everyone!

*Opens up her reserve box of Dom Perignon and passes bottles all over*

Any chance of a couple of gallons of Red Bull please? I need something to wake me up...

You can have the thunder storm we had at 6am this morning if you like?

Judging by the sky outside my window, I'm about to get it... I think I'm probably tired enough to sleep through it tho' so I'll stick to the Red Bull...

Trust me, if it's the one that passed over us, you won't be sleeping through it! :shock:

Strong Coffee please :O

:twisted: Comin right up sir :wink:

Sheesh.... talk about favouritism... I've been waiting ages for some Red Bull... :bicker:

:twisted: There you go madam :wink:
Sorry bout the wait :oops:

Hmmmm sweety can I have some water please..

I'd love to have a beer but as I have to work this evening I'll stick with the water.

:shock: Who are you calling madam? Any rumours you may have heard about me are.... ummm... entirely unfounded... yes, that's right, entirely unfounded...:oops:

so far .... :))

One Red Bull shower coming right up!!!

P.S. Favorite drink of this pub co-owner...

There is no need to steal my customers, eh? Not you they all come to see, dear...but your beautiful spouse...move over...

Glass of cool iced water for a beautiful lady...ummm...although you don't look much like a female???

Sir...would you like something??? Coffee? Tea? Ummm....yeah...that's about all for this offer..

Can I have a pint of Ummm then please? :))

thanks for the water dear ..needed that..


I don't lool like a female..

Hhhmmm maybe I should change my avatar.
so you can see what I look like..:cool:

:twisted: I know that my love :wink:
I'll let you serve on then while I go play some 8 ball :mrgreen:

Now this is the life :D

oke I've changed my avatar..

couldn't get myself posting one of my own pics..

OLIE B. BOMMEL I thought was a cute pic so this here


ahh one more water please before I go

Am finally able to stop by; busy morning at work. Can I have iced water as I have to make important phone call and want to be quite sober :pray:

Pint of ummm with whipped topping coming up!!!

*Looks to see if hubby is watching*

Ouch...me thinks me gonna get it tonight...:oops:

Ummm...I can see that you're ALL woman - no doubt about that...

Well, you can do your duty at home, dear...*wink*

:twisted: your gonna get SOMETHING darling :wink: :devil:

One iced cold water coming up!!!

Any news??? *holding her breath*

Hey...that was just neighborhood mailman...no need to get all huffy and puffy...

*Holding her breath...*

Another diamond ring???

:twisted: I thought you liked it when I huff and puff :wink:

*don't hold breath, try heavy breathing instead :lol: *

Not quite a diamond ring my sweet :roll: , but I think you'll like it :mrgreen:

Ummm...fur coat???

Guess it's about time I made a drink order...one White Russian, made my way..and a drink for Neil in praise for his post on meatloaf.net today! :D

:twisted: Comin right up?

Post?
By me?
On meatloaf.net?

Me doesn't think so :roll:

How about another White Russian? And give Caelan whatever she wants, please. :D

Inthis case an Ouzo please I need something strong
I'm lost

:twisted: Coming up ladies :mrgreen:

Can I have a crate of BUD & a nice Cheese & onion on Chibatta (toasted)

Gerry is paying he owes me big time - he forgot to tell me his email addy had changed :mad:

I thought he'd stopped loving me :roll:

thank you dear take one yourself..

Can i get a Southern comfort and a cherry coke please???

Vodka and coke for me!

Well, it's nightcap time. :yawn: How about my final usual before I leave. Great to see you two earlier in chat, albeit brief, Zina. Have fun, you two. :))

Oh my god...one day on jury duty and bar is virtually not tended...

Dear...oh dear...?????

M'am would that be in one glass or separately?

Ummm...one glass or two separate drinks?

Been to jury duty selection today...a bit confused...

:twisted: And how is my sweet lil white Russian tonight? :mrgreen:

Oh no...no sweet talking...

It has come to my attention that I have graduated American School of Bartending and know nothing of international drinks.

Vodka and coke coming up!!!

I have to go back to school or be fired...ouch...:(

:twisted: Now don't go pretending I can't twist you round my little finger when I turn the charm on :mrgreen:

I won't touch that with a 10 foot pole :shock: :)) How about a good stiff my White Russian special, Neil? Am in the mood. :roll: :(

:twisted: Got the bottle all ready :wink:

The wife has got half the customers on the stuff these days :shock:

Spoken like a true man...*batting her eyelashes*...darling...why don't you go and take out trash???

And right you're...this man got a head bigger than a beer keg...

I refuse to get into trouble with anyone...Thanks for the drink. Am real moody tonight,:angst: :bleh: :confused: :shrug: and I need the amusement I'm getting. Thanks everyone.

Amusement? You ain't seen nothing yet (of course, what you see is what you get...)

Today is Friday, and before the hot weather really comes on, let me have my usual, please. Hope it stays cool for you, Neil. The UK has to stay cooler than the Northeast US, or I have no place to hiberate to during the summer :))

You're all welcome to my weather....

Something warming, please

I'll happily take your cold, any day. :pray: And Neil, another special, please. See you are having computer problems. Good luck. I had a problem solved recently, so there is hope!

I don't have a cold

The weather is cold

GIVE ME ALCOHOL

Please

:D

I meant your weather, :lmao:

Who's gonna buy me a drink then?! :mrgreen:

:twisted: OK OK OK OK OK .
Drinks coming up all round.
Sorry, the missis has took the night off and i'm on my own at the moment :sad:

Nawww I'll help! *jumps behind the bar and gets the beers in for everyone*

;) to all the guys! :p

:twisted: OI :yikes:

:bicker:

:lol:

Sorry Neily boy!! I thought you'd appreciate the hand, while the missus was MIA! ^_^

I'll just be taking my free drinks and wages for the night now :mrgreen:

:twisted: Fair enough :wink:

:lol:

Hi, if I could please have one of my specials, which I'll drink while I'm waiting for chatters to arrive.
Need any help, Neil?:D

Milk, please

And a schnitzel, please

Like the say...when the cat is away...a mouse will play...*gives hubby dirty look*

schnitzels and strudels and milks and white russians coming right up...guvn't fell asleep me thinks...

No, but I can offer you a lovely root beer...