Chris drags a chair to the middle of the pub, stands on it and taps a glass to get everyones attention

Ladies, Gentlemen and the rest of you, I would like to apologise. While I was out getting tea, the girlfriend was browsing the forums and spotted my post about "Does Anyone wanna be my girlfriend?".

She has asked me to inform you that this was only a joke. I have a wonderful girlfriend who is far better than I could ever deserve and I am not looking for any others.

Also I am no longer available to dance with the beautiful ladies unless I wish to lose certain sections of my anatomy 8O 8O

puts the chair back adn wanders off!!

I'll join you and buy as many as you can drink! Don't let them get to you.

Lmao!!! awwww bless you!! Your girlfriend is very lucky!!! :wink:

What about me Chris! Huh! I'm not good enough for you all of a sudden! Is that it? 8O :cry:

Aww your good enough for me, but i doubt i'm good enough for you??

Thank you all - Andy - no it's not a foot transplant
Aging Bat - sorry you havinga crap day

I am having surgery on a trapped nerve in my groin - yes its bloody painful

Drinks all round please - i'm paying

Wayhey!! Right what will it be!! One at a time please!!!

I love you with all my loins dear!

Thanks FA. I'll have a baileys please

Awww bless!!! Aww have you seen the church we are gettin hitched at!!!!! :lol:

Baileys coimg up!!

*Passess baileys over!!*

Thanks Heli. I love the picture of the church. It's wonderful.

Would you like a drink?

Oooo, if your offering I wouldn't mind a glass of champaigne!! A toast to happiness!!

It's a bit early for me but of course you can have champagne. Celebrate in style

I have an announcement to make. Women will understand that i have a belly ache and they know the reason why. Men will be warned that Airhead today has PMT and so must be given satisfying amounts of chocolate and sympathy. That is all.

*picks up mop and wipes floor*

Sit down and have a nice drink and I'll clean up for you if you want Airhead

Thanks hun! are you sure?

Be careful, the mop likes to fall off at times.

No problem at all

*takes mop and starts cleaning*

Damn the mops fallen off already

*puts mop head back on and carries on*

Thank you!

Erm, heli, is there any chance of some paracetamol?

I've got some Ibuprofen if you need some

No thatnks i feel better now! Happy again had chocolate!

I have two left!! I used them all up (I have a belly ache too)!!

You can have some of the chocolate Ice cream if you want, and fill yourself a hot water bottle (their under the sink)!! I live in the basement so i have all my gear laying around!!

anyone around to serve??? :P

Thank you so much! *hugs hot water bottle*

Anyway, all glasses i have collected i will now wash up

Heli

Can I have a glass of milk please

Heli ain't here at mo so I'll get you a glass of milk. :D

can i have a bud please? :D

Testify... Sorry, i'll get sacked. Have a creamy emma instead

*whips up gold top milk, double cream, crusha, whisks it, adds a cherry for decoration* Voila!

well can i sneak in the back n get my own?


thanks for the thingy u made me hehe

airhead

thanks for the milk - off to bed now
:zzz:

Back now!! Anylast requests before i go to bed??

Yes, did you read my pm?!? :lol:

Errrr has anybody bothered to clean in here recently? These ash trays are filthy :evil: :evil:

*everyone looks at airhead* :roll:

sure it wasn't this guys fault

http://www.blushingbuyer.com/acatalog/bernie.jpg

God what a mess

*Goes around emptying all the ashtrays and cleaning the tables*

Sorry everyone!

Black Dog, let me do that please hun!

Typical, i have one day off and the pub is already a mess! :roll:

*Cleans whole pub until spick and span*

Aww, there ther!! Here have a glass of Apple Juice!!

It looks great in here now. Good work Airhead

Hey BD, do you want a drink or anything?? :D

Heli

got me a crate of Red stripe please 8O

Awww Sharon!! It's coming right up!! Here you can have the comfy stool all to yourself for the next week!!!

Here you are, just ask me when you want another redstripe!! :wink:


So how did it go??? Are you alright???

Aaah, thanks Heli! I'll have a nice yazoo banana (Got a thing about yazoo lately)

A Yazoo it is then!!

*hands over a banana Yazoo to edwina*

Anything else??

Found this little ~~~~~~ sniffing the rabbits hutch! :evil:

http://greatestescapetravel.com/albu...s/red_fox.html

(strange i have this pic at home!)

Heli

thanks for the comfy chair - appriciate it

can i have another beer please

Red Stripe again??

Here you are!! :wink:

Three Pints of Lager and a packet of crisps please :(

Aaah, hun, why the long face? Come here, I've got a shoulder here all ready to be cried on!

put me in the corner for the week - i'll be fine - plenty of comfort, sympathy & beer - be right as rain



:|

Remember, I have two shoulders here!

One for you and one for you and a box of kleenex for all of us!

Thank you ..... i'm just still a little bit shaken by events from yesterday, so needed cheering up :cry:

Can I bring my dog in here? Don't want to get thrown out :(

Can't see any signs saying no dogs allowed but best check with rest of the regulars at the bar over there

Course dogs are allowed..... as long as they remember that my Scrabble is the pub top dog :D

Thank God for that. I thought I was going to get banned!!

Andy

In that case I will bring my dog - Dougie in

think we're going to need to extend again, perhaps a doggie room as well as a family room?

http://www.musicinkent.co.uk/graphics/pubdog.gif

I don't want to be in a seperate room Andy :cry: . I like it in the main bar. :D

** FA walks in - abit stiff and sits down in comfy chair Heli has provided**

**Dougie the dog sniffs around the pub then sits next to FA**

http://www.puppydogweb.com/gallery/f...eld_brooks.jpg

*FA gets comfortable and reads* until someone else joins her

AndyK - don't worry he's house trained.

but is he pub trained?

Actually, when you look at the state of the place, most of thje regulars in here aren't really house trained are they? :lmao:

Hey, I'm almost there!! I'm learning how to go to the toilet in time!!! :D

Ok guys, I need your opinion about the wedding!!

What do you think to these flowers??

http://www.caconline.org/cacartists/...W/gladioli.jpg


Anyone want a drink or some food?? I feel pretty lonely at the mo!!

heli

The flowers are lovely - who u marrying ?

Can I gave a red stripe, and a packet of cheese & onion crisps + a bowl of water for Dougie please

http://66.96.167.151/graphics/buddylogoxsm.gif

IS THERE ANY ENTERTAINMENT TONITE DO YOU KNOW ?

COULD DO WITH A LAUGH

It's games night tonight, darts, dominoes, skittles, table football, space invaders, pool, monopoly, naked mud wrestling, you name it.........

Heehee!! can we play fuzzy duck??? Please!!!!!! I love that game!!!!

Beautiful flowers, Heli! 8)

Andy...are you going to mud-wrestle tonight!?:up: Think I will come back for this event later! :lol: ...who are you wrestling with?

xxx

Mariella

any volunteers?????????? I'm very choosy on my opponents though ;)

AndyK wrote:

lovely - who will challenge Andy - have to see that 8O 8O

hey all, can i have a bud please.


btw is anyone havin troubles signing on to msn tonite?

Heli's marrying me. We're getting The Police to reform and play at the reception. The gladioli were my idea. . . :oops:

Yes T, I'm having trouble with MSN. . .

Love the flowers Heli. They'll be great for your big day.

Could I have a vodka and coke, please

Congrates Badger & Heli

http://adisney.go.com/disneyvideos/a...ib_story14.jpg

Drinks all round - even the dogs

yes msn not working tonite

Thanks FA. Nice to see you in here tonight.

What are you implying FA! That's awfully rude. . .Heli's no beast!

hi black dog

nice to be here - can't wait for andy's naked mud wrestling

heli - line the beers up please - put badger down

badger - no not now she ain't - you broke the spell :lmao:

:D Loverly Jubberly

Do you know who the opposition is yet?

bring it on boys

http://members.fortunecity.com/wrgifs/ycm04.gif

the muds all ready - so are us gals :wink:

Got the camera out ready for the mud wrestling.

Think I'll go and have a game of darts before it starts. Hope I don't hit the wall too many times :oops:

*Steps in the ring and strips. . .*

Come on then!

*rushes over with camera and starts snapping*

*Poses*

Awww *at the picture* but the only thing different about my story was that my prince charming wasn't a beast in the first place!! :wink:

You're cute as a buttonl. . .MW-AH!

This computer is too slpw for my liking!! Let me get onto the main comp and then I'll beservering as quick as ever!!!

Righ i'm on!! So what was it what everyone wanted??

I think I'm going to enjoy working here tonight!!!

Heli! I looked at some L plates and I remembered.. Hen Night!!!!!!!!!!!!

Whens the wedding?

Alright then andy, i'll mud wrestle ya!!!!!!!

Shows muscles (trust me, i am quite stocky for a girl)

Anyone interested in wrestling this man ?????


http://smackdown.wwe.com/superstars/...takersd_lg.jpg

*Hides from scary Undertaker*

Anyone interested in wrestling this man ?????


http://smackdown.wwe.com/superstars/...takersd_lg.jpg

Got my fav wrestler to come along - he loves a beer too

http://raw.wwe.com/superstars/austin/images/austin1.jpg

I'll rather wrestle this one!!

http://ffmedia.ign.com/filmforce/image/kevin_nash1.jpg

heehee!!

Come on then!

*Strips, and jumps in mud*