bloozvox |
11 Jul 2010 02:50 |
Straight from the mouth of the 'fat dungeon master'
WOW... you guys can be cruel... but S*** happens... I DO resemble that remark... I was born that way and got worse with age... many years of booz, boxing, beer, American football, Jack Daniels, motorcycles, booz, rock'n roll and tough neighborhood brawling on the wrong side of the tracks in the Bronx, NY... and booz... did I say booz?... your comments would be 'fightin' words' at the schoolyard...so if you're taller than me, I'll have to give your belly-button a black eye....we usually have to fight our way out of the Bronx... not too many of us make it out... I may have made it out, but I guess the only thing missing is a hump off the back of my right shoulder... I even have my own clunky set of keys... but there aren't any keys to dungeon cells...sometimes I wake up in the morning and I have to push my nose back to the front 'cause it's by my ear!!! I tried shaving the mullet off, and women would gather up their children to cross the street to avoid me... my old lady at the time wouldn't sleep next to me 'cause I looked like a psychotic killer...it was absolutely demoralizing...I was thinking about having some Japanese thing at the back of my head with a long skinny braid... whaddya think? It sucks having a 'no hair' day all the time as opposed to a 'bad hair' day sometimes ... But enuff... I won't bore or regale you with any fantastic stories of my life...unless you ask nicely... over cocktails... I'll buy the first round...
My looks never scared any of the kids I play Santa for... I do it religiously every year...maybe some adults should learn a lesson from children... there is nothing in the world like seeing the expression of a child who pulls my ugly 'dungeon master' hair or beard, and suddenly beams a smile and a wide-eyed glow, exclaiming, "Mummy... it IS Santa Claus..." They don't see a 'fat dungeon master' or one of the 'three blind mice'... boy, that's a relief!!!...'cause that's what I see everyday!!!
SHEFFIELD STEEL is a 'facebook' page here in the USA... I am too... mine is a bigger page, of course, to cover the pixel space of a 'fat dungeon master'... SHEFFIELD STEEL is a name in recognition of Joe's 2nd(?) album and the city of his birth... a city whose reputation for hi-end steel works for the last 200 yrs at least, is legendary... personally being from working stock, I was proud to be in a band named with such a legacy... SHEFFIELD STEEL started as a Joe Cocker Tribute simply due to the original personnel all being Joe's band alumni, but we expanded to a ten piece... and with that expanded horizons to other rock with a focus on Joe... the personnel are all world class musicians and great people... and alot better looking than any 'dungeon master'...just take a look at the Goff sisters.... as gentlemen please... I know ... it's tough keeping your imagination in check...
I couldn't believe in a million yrs I'd be on a UK MEATLOAF fan site... but truth is stranger than fiction... and if we ever get the chance to perform for you... I'm sure we'll blow the doors off the place... pls come on over and say hello... I won't lock you up, knock you over, or 'apple-bonk' you... although I may regale you with stories of the Bronx and the world as I've seen it over drinks...
BTW... all best wishes to MEAT, his family... the band... the crew... any and all members of the organization... from the rock'n roll brethren and sisters from this side of the pond... special shout out to my buddy Danny Miranda playin' bass for y'all now... a safe and successful tour...
GB&ATB.... G:o)
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