If the parents separate when they aren't married, the father has to go to court to get a Parental Responsibility order, which gives him the same Parental rights as the mother. These days a DNA test is usually done to make sure the man really is the father, but if the mother protests, a PR order is usually granted anyway - it's a quick, pretty cheap thing to do. After that, because the father has parental rights, they can then go to court and are ENTITLED to contact with the children. Maybe your dad didn't know about this? Hope you're close now anyway...
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