Sticking to a theme
"So, Mr Brown, what can I do for you?" the doctor said to the old gent sitting in his office.
"Well believe it or not" the old boy (who is 90 if he's a day) starts, "i'd like to have more children, and I was wondering if you could tell me how likley that would be".
"The first thing we'd have to determine would be your fertility" says the doctor, desperatly trying not to laugh.
"Here", if you would just take this jam jar home, and fill it up, i'll be able to send it away for a sperm count, and that will tell us the probability of you fathering any more children".
"Oh thank you doctor" Mr Brown exclaimed.
"No problem" the doc said, "just remember to book an apointment for next Tuesday at reception".
The next Tuesday the doctor buzzes his intercom, and asks his receptionist to send in Mr Brown.
"So how are you?" the doctor asks to a very crestfallen Brown.
"Not too good i'm afraid" says brown placing the jam jar, still completly empty, on the doctors desk.
"Mr Brown, I asked you to fill this jar" says the doctor.
"I know" moaned Brown, "but first I tried it, and it wouldn't work, so I called the wife in to give it a go, she tried it one handed, then with both hands, but she just couldn't make it work".
So what happened next?" the doctor asked.
"Well I told the Mrs to go and get Mrs Finchley from next door to see if she could get things going....."
"You asked your neighbour?" said the doctor in a shocked voice.
"yes" said Brown."She tried with the left hand, then the right hand, then she even tried it in her mouth, but she couldn't make it work".
"Mr Brown, I...."
"She even took her false teeth out to get more suction" said the miserable Brown.That's when I thought of the monkey wrench".
M M Mon key wr wr wrench? stammered the doctor going very pale.
"I thought it was worth a go" said Brown, "I mean, let's face it, it wasn't working the way it was, it ws useless, so if it broke, it wasn't like I was losing much.
"So let me get this righ" the doctor said firmly, "you tried yourself first?".
"Yes".
"But it wouldn't work?"
"No".
"So then you got your wife to try, then your neighbour with her mouth, and then you even tried a monkey wrench?"
"That's right" wailed Brown...................................
Wait for it
"BUT WE STILL COULDN'T GET THAT FECKING JAM JAR LID OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Well what do you think he was going to say
