Ok - the sonofabitch joke translated by
The Dialectiizer
A priest decides t' take a walk t' de pieh near his church.
He looks around 'n final stops t' watch a fishehman load his boat.
De fishehman notices, duuhhhh, 'n asks de priest if he wudd like t' dgoin him f' a couble of hours.
De priest agrees.
De fishehman asks if de priest has ebeh fishid bef'e, uh uh uh, t' which de priest says no.
He baits de hook f' him 'n says, duuhhhh, "Gibe it a shot fadeh".
Afteh a few minoots, duuhhhh, de priest hooks a big fish 'n struggles t' get it in he boat.
De fishehman says "Whoa, what a big sonofabitch! Doihh, COOL!"
Priest: "Uh, blease sir, can you mind your language, duh...uh...?"
Fishehman: (THINKING QUICKLY) "I'm sorry fadeh, but dat's what dis fish is callid - a sonofabitch! Doihh, COOL!"
Priest:"Oh, I'm sorry - I didn't know."
Afteh the, duh uhh, trip, de priest briggs the, uh uh uh, fish t' the, errr, church 'n spots de bishop.
Priest: "Eminess, look at dis bigsonofabitch! Doihh, COOL!"
Bishop: "Please Fadeh, mind your language, uh uh uh, dis is a house of God."
Priest: "No, you don't undehstand - dat's what dis fish is called, uh uh uh uh, 'n I caught it. DOIHH!I caught dis sonofabitch! Doihh, COOL!"
Bishop: "Hmmm. Duh, you know, uh uh uh uh uh uh, I cudd clean dis sonofabitch 'n webuh cudd habe it f' dinneh."
So de Bishop takes the, uh uh uh, fish 'n cleans it, uh, 'n briggs it t' Modeh Supehior at the, errr, conbent.
Bishop: "Modeh Supehior cudd you cook dis sonofabitch f' dinneh tonite, duh...uh...?"
Modeh Supehior: "My lord, uh uh uh uh, what language! Huh huh!"
Bishop: "No, Sisteh, dat's what the, uh uh uh, fish is callid - a sonofabitch! Doihh, COOL! Fadeh caught it, uh, I cleanid it, uh, 'n webuh'd like you t' cook it."
Modeh Supehior: "Hmmm. Duh, yes, duuhhhh, I'll cook dat sonofabitch tonite."
Webuhll, de Pope stops by f' dinneh wid the, duh uhh, three of dem, 'n dey all dink the, uh uh uh, fish is great. He asks whehe dey got it.
Priest: "I caught the, ERRRR, sonofabitch! Doihh, COOL!"
Bishop: "And I cleanid the, ERRRR, sonofabitch! Doihh, COOL!"
Modeh Supehior: And I cookid the, ERRRR, sonofabitch! Doihh, COOL!"
De Pope stares at dem f' a minoot wid a stee gaze, uh uh uh, but den takes off his hat, uh, puts his feet up on the, duh uhh, taggle, 'n says
"You know, uh uh uh uh uh uh, you fockehs are all rite".
