A couple are settled in one night when an escaped criminal bursts into their home.
After overpowering them both, he ties them tightly to a pair of chairs.
After stalking round the house to make sure all exits are blocked he goes and speaks quietly in the womans ear.She then whispers back to him.
The criminal strides off in the direction of the bathroom.
The husband says.........
"Jane, we don't have much time so just listen.This guy means business.He's been locked up in jail for god knows how long and probably hasn't even SEEN a woman in years.
Now, he's probably going to want to have sex with you.
If you resist he'll most likely slit my throat, kill you, and escape to find some other poor victim, so please, for us, let him have his way with you.
Be strong hunni, I love you".
To which she replies.........
"actually Brian, when he whispered in my ear he told me that he's been in solitary confinement for the past 12 years as he can't be integrated with the other prisoners because of his mania for homosexual rape.
He then told me he REALLY fancies you and asked if there was any baby oil in the house, I told him in the bathroom, first cupboard on the left, middle shelf, he's gone to get it now.
Be strong hunni, I love you very much too".