It's been over a year since the Joke thread was used
Time for a new one
Carrying on from
here
How full of water is your glass?
I met with 20 people to see what they thought.
An optimist - It's half full.
A pesimist - It's half empty.
A communist - The glass is no longer yours. We are taking the glass off you, and we are going to share the water between 50,000,000 people.
A fascist - Don't ask questions. Go to the nearest camp for "re-education".
A pirate - Why's the rum gone?
A capitalist - How much will you give me for it?
A Chinaman - I can produce more glasses of water than you, ship them 2,000 miles, and still sell them cheaper.
A martian - WTF is in that glass?
A govenment minister - I think it goes without saying there is more water in the glass than there was under my predesesors administration.
A customer service opperator - I can't tell you that right now, but if you listen to the Four Seasons for a couple of hours i'll let you know.
Jesus - Hey dude, you wanna see a trick, I mean this fill freak you the F*ck OUT! Watch the water, watch the water, BOOM! what did I tell you?
Steven King - It's full of tiny mosters that want to kill you as soon as you drink the water.
An Eskimo - There's no water, just a big ass ice cube.
A surrelist - It's the water that keeps the rest of the world falling into the glass.
A Scot - How much Whiskey can I get into that glass?
A fish - Not enough.
A Frenchman - I don't know, I give up.
A resident of Death Valley - It was full, but by the time you asked the question it's gone bone dry.
A tax man - It's your glass, but I want some.
Justin Bieber - Why did you just punch me?