all to your self

Julie had carefully prepared the evening's entertainment, straight after dinner she would be

moving to Argentina with her surprise lover, a stripper who could

remove his

big hairy

badger from

underneath his coat without

the need for a safety net

No-one knew what a stripper was doing keeping a badger underneath his coat, or what he was doing wearing a coat in the first place, except Julie, as he'd told her (whilst drunk) that it was all in the name of

Basil Brush. Who as we all know is a Fox and not a Badger, and certainly not a stripper. Julie was, of course, as baffled by this as everyone else, but she was beginning to come to terms with the strange twists and turns that her life was experiencing. Outside the wind rustled in the trees and the birds twittered.

As opposed to Brian, who was just a twit.

Anyway, Julie and her secret badger carrying, lover called

Alonso Ferdinando Enrique Humberto Jones

or, Gaz for short,

decided to have a slow dance in the kitchen though it was only a matter of time before Julie realised...

that Gaz was dancing to an entirely different beat, a fact made all the more obvious by his obsession with

putting his left foot in, his left foot out, in, out, in, out and shaking it all about

until a news flash came on the radio. It announced loudly

that a dangerous

comet was spiralling

anti-clockwise towards Bridlington.

Gaz decided to

Jump out the window onto Julies already trampled flower bed (due to the toilet ice block accident earlier that day) however as he leapt through the window, his badger, that was beneath his coat somehow lodged onto the window lock causing Gaz....

recoil in total horror at the sight.

The breeze caused the tree's to rustle and kicked up small spirals of dust from the road, down which came a black stretch limo.