slightly disoriented octopus on a record turntable set to 78 rpm.

with Mario Lanza singing his heart out...........

However Mario Lanza was Brians 4th favorite artist, so all was not lost.

All in fact knew exactly where he was as he'd been carrying a GPS system with him all day, even though he hadn't left his house.

All had not left the house for years, in fact, as he had a really stupid name which caused lots of problems for him. All did all of his shopping via the internet, although delivery was a bit of a problem because he lived

in a dark and damp and dangerous and deadly (and lots of other words beginning with D) place, called

Luton

. But anyway, we digress enough about All, who is inconsequential to this story because of his

immense dislike for swimwear.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch, our anti-hero Brian was

leaning rather breathlessly up against a wall, having gotten out of breath with his running, and as he leaned there, trying to get his breath back, a motorcycle courier wandered up beside him, and handed him a large parcel, containing his rubber sheep, which he promptly

unwrapped and inflated, before asking the motorcycle courier why he'd wandered up to him and not ridden, since he was indeed a motorcycle courier and not a walking courier. The courier was baffled by this line of questioning, until he realised someone had stolen his

scooter, and he'd had to resort to roller skates which gave him blisters, hence the wandering rather than a brisk purposeful walk. Having sorted out the mystery, Brian dressed himself in the sheep, inserting his

finger

delicately into the

mains socket

which shocked him all over his

home town.

All the people was thinking

"When will Brian meet the woman of his dreams, the toad-figured, muppet-headed Julie?"...

"Ahhhh Julie......" Brian often dreamily said under his breath, if only he could persuede her to go on a date with him, the last time he asked her she said a rather abrupt "No" due to.....

him asking her "Why is the Rum gone?". Now,

unfortunetly Julie did not share Brian's passion for Sheep which meant

she was possibly Little Bo Peep in another of her many lifetimes. Anyway, Julie resembled a monkey's

favourite banana, although she had a hard time accepting this, she