My essay on Meat Loaf...

meatloaf-unofficial · 09 Oct 2007, 20:29

I fancied posting this... Its a persuasive essay about Meat Loaf that I had to do for a unit in English and I had to pass it.... and.... I Did

I was well pleased with it. Mainly as it was on a topic that I love and is close to my heart...
Hope you all like it too

Ross

Is Meat Loaf Past His Sell-By Date?
Ross Pomfret – 2nd October 2007

From time to time we hear of artists playing live and not having the ‘X factor’ anymore that they used to have. You maybe wondering why this has come about. Is it due to age? Health? One rock legend who has had critics all studying him is Meat Loaf, owner of Bat Out Of Hell (Rock’s Most Epic Adventure) which stayed in the charts for over 400 weeks and sold over 30 million copies. Following on with the Bat idea which remained and led to the release of Bat Out Of Hell II: Back Into Hell in 1993. A massive come back for Meat Loaf with a massive world tour. Great publicity, both for the album and the tour and from the public’s vote led him to get an award for best vocal at the Brits 1994. The following year saw the release of what was to become Bat III, the third instalment but later shelved and later was released as; Welcome to The Neighbourhood. You may be thinking why are critics complaining that he hasn’t got the power anymore?

Increasingly, critics began to think this as he seemed to disappear until his next album; Couldn’t Have Said It Better which flourished onto the shop shelves like a battering ram in April of 2003. Following the release of what Meat Loaf claimed was the best album yet, vocal wise was a big World Tour allegedly to be his last.

During this tour, critics began to comment on how rough he sounded on some of the shows and how good he sounded on others in the UK. This was to change, even for Meat Loaf when on 17 November 2003, Meat Loaf collapsed after quoting to the audience; “Ladies and gentlemen I apologise to you at this point in time. I've been suffering with the flu for 10 days now. I really, really wanted to come and perform for you tonight. They didn't want me to but I did and ladies and gentlemen I apologise to all of you right now. I am in no... I'm sorry, I really cannot go on, I'm terribly sorry, I love you all”. Newspaper reporters claimed that the man is past it!

To prove them wrong, Meat Loaf was back on the road touring Europe despite his health. This did not escape the reporter’s eye. They were back out there to comment more about his performance. In November 2004, the mighty Loaf visited Glasgow and this was one show where the press ran wild! Boasting a career with some songs clocking in at just over 10 minutes, after all they are mini soap opera’s, and an impressive voice, the reporter’s were ready with their pens to jot down what a great concert it was to be. Within the first two songs, the press could see that this would be a concert from hell! With reference to a review from journalist; Elaine Macintyre, Meat Loaf’s voice was somewhat ‘strained as well arousing fears that he could be losing his magic touch’. Audience members announced that it was the worst show they had ever been to, he was ‘drunk, out of tune and a waste of money and is well past it’.

Wait one second, you maybe thinking, is he really past it, or is that just people commenting that he is past it because they are not true Meat Loaf fans? Well, there are several accounts stating that the larger than life rock god/part time actor is well on track to hitting the high notes.

October 2006 saw the release of what was the next generation in the Bat relatives; Bat Out Of Hell III: The Monster Is Loose. With a pre-tour which was announced as ‘The Bases Are Loaded Tour’ was to prove all people that Meat Loaf was not past it but instead within his best before date. Making his only 2006 UK show at London’s Royal Albert Hall, looked to be the best review since his Bat Out Of Hell II Tour back in 1993. The Mail On Sunday stated that ‘he was powerful and knew how to put on a show. His voice too was in good nick, able to hit those high notes in songs such as; I’d Do Anything for Love and Bat Out Of Hell.’ The only downside to the show, certain press articles, naming one; startled all fans by expressing ‘he is only suitable for coach parties – his panto performance and the lack in hardness to his music has toned down slightly’.

Apart from the odd glitch in the 2006 UK show, Meat was back in March 2007 and was raising arena’s roofs, and therefore getting the publicity that he should be getting. The Bat was back!

Critics, at last, were not complaining about how bad he was, but praising how amazing he was. The first UK gig for the tour was in Manchester. It was described by Carly from the UK Fan Site as ‘Riding the wave’, a giant wave of explosive sound, colour, spectacle and sheer excitement that lifted us up and carried us on a rushing crest of peerless rock and roll for two and a half hours. Other articles from the tour including shows at Birmingham state that the place was completely “batty” according to the Birmingham Mail which went on to say the band were in ship shape and for the voice, it couldn’t of been any better.

Motoring back to the last review of Meat’s Glasgow concert, you would think, time to recover and he would be back on and firing on all cylinders. Elaine Macintyre reviews ‘having taken the stage once again after claiming his last Glasgow show was his last, he should have been better letting it lie – coming out on stage not able to sustain a note on Paradise and thinking if Meat Loaf had lost it as he was bringing back the 1977 appearance; the long hair and suit’.

Just when you thought things could get worse – they didn’t! After the second half, the same person reviewed it a lot better; ‘Maybe it's because his voice has finally warmed up and given us a show that we really wanted, with numbers which contain much emotion and songs such as Blind As A Bat, a great Rock ballad’.

As we come down to earth, you may still think I’m not convinced that Meat is past his sell-by date. Meat Loaf has a second profession besides being a rock artist, he’s an actor too. Many people claim that he is still a great actor and will be for a long time to come.

Meat Loaf has appeared in roughly 30 films including hits such as; “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” as Eddie and in 2006 he appeared in Tenacious D: The Pick Of Destiny as Jack Black’s father. To follow this idea and success in films; he has been featured in an article by Fred Topel claims he’s “Incredibly Professional” and how on time he was compared to other artists.

In other parts of Loaf’s life; he has been an influence to people besides fans. Apparently; Chemical Romance, had gone to him to ask for advise on how to do a song and how to perform it, expressing the emotions. This clearly show that whatever age you are, you can still be an influence to someone and shows that he is not yet to date, past it.

Back pathing, clearly stating he is now past his music profession is the time being able to work again with old friends. Let’s face it, if he was past it, they wouldn’t work with him. It’s as simple as that. For Bat Out Of Hell III, he joined forces with old-time songwriter who wrote the first two Bat albums; Jim Steinman. Also in company was producer; Tod Rungdren, who managed to capture the first Bat Out Of Hell and capture all the emotion and transfer it to something people could hear. Beside old recruits, he has gained new friends whilst making his new album; Desmond Child joined forces to produce the album after Steinman took a back seat due to having quite a few heart attacks and strokes. This follows the idea that he must still be great to have other producers come to him and ask whether they are able to carry this larger than life project and make it something that’s similar to the other Bat albums.

All in all, there is only one correct answer to this issue of whether Meat Loaf is past his sell-by date or not. The answer to it, is your own. It’s one’s opinion to decide – depending if you’re a die-hard fan or a musician that loves many genres, the correct answer lies in your heart and yours only and what you believe!

To me, he will always rock my world; after all, I am one of those sad people that would spend all their money on tickets if allowed.

**RadioMaster** · 09 Oct 2007, 20:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by meatloaf-unofficial

he joined forces with old-time songwriter who wrote the first two Bat albums; Jim Steinman.

he did?

Evil One · 09 Oct 2007, 20:58

My head hurts.

djfierce · 09 Oct 2007, 21:03

i know you've made it small so not to take up too much space but that really is too small for me to read all that Ross. Any chance of changing it?

meatloaf-unofficial · 09 Oct 2007, 21:39

Quote:

Originally Posted by djfierce

i know you've made it small so not to take up too much space but that really is too small for me to read all that Ross. Any chance of changing it?

As for some reason it won't let me edit it so I've copied and pasted it here:

**Edit** ... and I've cut it out

... original post tidied up a bit.

Pudding · 09 Oct 2007, 22:36

Quote:

Originally Posted by meatloaf-unofficial

I fancied posting this... Its a persuasive essay about Meat Loaf

Persuasive in what way?

Quote:

Originally Posted by RadioMaster

Quote:

Originally Posted by meatloaf-unofficial

he joined forces with old-time songwriter who wrote the first two Bat albums; Jim Steinman.

he did?

Apparently so

didn't you get the memo?

What I'd like to know is, who really wrote that essay? Because the difference in writing styles and the lack of spelling and grammar mistakes, compared to Ross's posts on here are worlds apart.

Pud

djfierce · 10 Oct 2007, 01:25

well it was certainly written by a fan lol

just a small correction - 17th November when he collapsed, he collapsed during a song, came back to attempt the beginning of AFL then made his announcement of stopping the show.

And even a Meat fan would have to admit that Steinman took a lot more than a back seat in bat 3.

mszee · 10 Oct 2007, 02:13

ok

meatloaf-unofficial · 10 Oct 2007, 11:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pudding

Persuasive in what way?

Apparently so

didn't you get the memo?

What I'd like to know is, who really wrote that essay? Because the difference in writing styles and the lack of spelling and grammar mistakes, compared to Ross's posts on here are worlds apart.

Pud

Trust me Pud - that was my work and mine only....

I wanted to do it differently than my normal layout for essays as when I said to my teacher this is what I wanted to do; he sayed ok then do it but I felt he was sceptic. he said if I could write an essay on meat Loaf, then he'd be pleased to read it, and I was so determind to prove him wrong.. And I did!

Deb · 10 Oct 2007, 11:21

Let's just hope your teacher isn't a huge Meat fan and then you'll get away with all the factually incorrect statements lol

meatloaf-unofficial · 10 Oct 2007, 11:29

what I have some factual statments that are wrong? Please tell me as I would like to know

evil nickname · 10 Oct 2007, 12:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by meatloaf-unofficial

what I have some factual statments that are wrong? Please tell me as I would like to know

Glancing over the minor ones, these stood out to me.

Quote:

Following the release of what Meat Loaf claimed was the best album yet

I think Meat claimed CHSIB was his "most perfect album since Bat", but can't find a source besides Wikipedia.

Quote:

‘The Bases Are Loaded Tour’ was to prove all people that Meat Loaf was not past it but instead within his best before date.

To the best of my knowledge, it was never claimed that the "The Bases Are Loaded" tour should prove Meat was not past it.

Quote:

Making his only 2006 UK show at London’s Royal Albert Hall, looked to be the best review since his Bat Out Of Hell II Tour back in 1993.

Unless you have read any and all reviews of all shows he did, I doubt this is true.

Quote:

For Bat Out Of Hell III, he joined forces with old-time songwriter who wrote the first two Bat albums; Jim Steinman.

As said before, clearly not the case.

Quote:

Desmond Child joined forces to produce the album after Steinman took a back seat due to having quite a few heart attacks and strokes.

Child didn't join forces with anyone: he produced the album on his own. Steinman did not take the back seat: he was not involved at all, as he declined a offer that would make him the best paid producer in Rock History (or so we're told), and only gave permission to use Pig and Cry To Heaven in the lawsuit-settlement.
And please, define "quite a few" and source that claim.

And for a persuasive essay, this is the ultimate cop-out:

Quote:

All in all, there is only one correct answer to this issue of whether Meat Loaf is past his sell-by date or not. The answer to it, is your own.

Unless I'm mistaken what it means to write a persuasive essay, I'd say that when you ask "Is Meat Loaf Past His Sell-By Date?", you should make a case whether or not he is past it based on the available "evidence" and "facts", and reach a conclusive yes-or-no answer in the end.

But then again, I'm not a teacher.

meatloaf-unofficial · 10 Oct 2007, 12:28

I see... Slight minors, but apart from that - you have to say the essay is quite good

*AndyK* · 10 Oct 2007, 12:50

OK, you asked for feedback, here we go

Personally speaking, I agree with Evil. A persuasive essay should be just that, an essay that presents an argument for or against a topic, in this case "Is Meat past his sell by date?". You present a series of researched facts and details which, as has been pointed out are somewhat lacking in accuracy, and then you don't draw any conclusion or put forward an argument as to why that conclusion should be the right one. Other than the fact that you think you're a sad person because ytou want to go to a number fo Meat shows ... that's hardly going to persuade anyone else to go is it?

I don't know what the exact brief was for the esay, but based on the facts you've provided, which was that you had to right a persuasive essay on a topic of your choosing. I'd have failed it, but then, I'm not a teacher ... which is probably a good thing

evil nickname · 10 Oct 2007, 13:34

Quote:

Originally Posted by meatloaf-unofficial

I see... Slight minors, but apart from that - you have to say the essay is quite good

As you failed to persuade me, I don't and I won't.

meatloaf-unofficial · 10 Oct 2007, 13:34

no I put it up as I did want feedback to see what other meaty Fans thought of it and its good... I tried to have a go at it and I must of done something right as he passed me

daveake · 10 Oct 2007, 14:22

Quote:

Originally Posted by meatloaf-unofficial

I must of done something right as he passed me

Standards are dropping, as evidenced by teachers not teaching proper English. "must of" would have resulted in a flogging at the very least in my day

Dave

Deb · 10 Oct 2007, 18:36

You;ve also got the tour starting in March. Not sure if you mean here or the States, either way it's wrong. States - Feb & UK - May

LucyK! · 10 Oct 2007, 18:43

Andy's saved me a job as I was about to say the same...I'm the geek in the class who loves art history and i'm in heaven writing an essay and I take great interest in language...if I was marking that as piece of writing I'd have given you a mark (assuming that I was an impartial teacher and not a Meat fan), but as a persuasive argument I'd have failed it. Not good writing a piece that's a mile long but doesn't cover the brief.

meatloaf-unofficial · 10 Oct 2007, 18:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deb

You;ve also got the tour starting in March. Not sure if you mean here or the States, either way it's wrong. States - Feb & UK - May

Tour started in March. Canada then US

Sorry if I mixed you all up....

**RadioMaster** · 10 Oct 2007, 18:53

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deb

Let's just hope your teacher isn't a huge Meat fan and then you'll get away with all the factually incorrect statements lol

Let's even more hope he's not a steinman fan!

Quote:

Originally Posted by AndyK

OK, you asked for feedback, here we go

Personally speaking, I agree with Evil. A persuasive essay should be just that, an essay that presents an argument for or against a topic, in this case "Is Meat past his sell by date?". You present a series of researched facts and details which, as has been pointed out are somewhat lacking in accuracy, and then you don't draw any conclusion or put forward an argument as to why that conclusion should be the right one. Other than the fact that you think you're a sad person because ytou want to go to a number fo Meat shows ... that's hardly going to persuade anyone else to go is it?

I don't know what the exact brief was for the esay, but based on the facts you've provided, which was that you had to right a persuasive essay on a topic of your choosing. I'd have failed it, but then, I'm not a teacher ... which is probably a good thing

jeez, andy, you've really taking the spelling lessons, didnt you?

evil nickname · 10 Oct 2007, 18:55

Quote:

Originally Posted by daveake

"must of" would have resulted in a flogging at the very least in my day

But that's only because you're an ancient relic, Dave

LucyK! · 10 Oct 2007, 18:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by meatloaf-unofficial

Tour started in March. Canada then US

Sorry if I mixed you all up....

Re-read what Deb said, tour started in February in the US and got to the UK in May.

Another point I'd agree with is what evil nickname said about the ending, if you're writing a persuasive piece you're meant to push people towards whichever corner you're fighting for, so it defeats the object to let the reader make up their own mind...it's like when you write a story as a kid and can't think of an ending so you finish with "and then he woke up and it was all a dream"

meatloaf-unofficial · 10 Oct 2007, 19:05

well the way I was meant to say is, was he was back in March - I didn't specify where though, so I assumed you'd know the US or Canada. Though when I read from someone who isn't in my mind; I get where your coming from. Sounds like he's back in the UK in March - which is wrong! Hope that doesn't confuse people even more

And I see also Lucy what you mean by the ending; you feel as if I've kinda plonked it on the end as I couldn't think of one and suppose I should of said something along the lines of; he's not past it at all and he's still a great performer and will keep performing until he physically can't.

**RadioMaster** · 10 Oct 2007, 19:06

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lucy!

Re-read what Deb said, tour started in February in the US and got to the UK in May.

Another point I'd agree with is what evil nickname said about the ending, if you're writing a persuasive piece you're meant to push people towards whichever corner you're fighting for, so it defeats the object to let the reader make up their own mind...it's like when you write a story as a kid and can't think of an ending so you finish with "and then he woke up and it was all a dream"

yep, lucy's absolutely right.
what you did here was writing a consideration paper (or however its called) concluding with your own statement/opinion.
In a persuasive essay, on the other hand, your own opinion is the least thing that should appear. You have to be able to persuade someone about something as good as you can, even if your personal opinion is totally different.

09 Oct 2007, 20:29	#1
meatloaf-unofficial Mega Loafer Join Date: 06.02.2006 Location: Touring the Country Posts: 2,558	My essay on Meat Loaf... I fancied posting this... Its a persuasive essay about Meat Loaf that I had to do for a unit in English and I had to pass it.... and.... I Did I was well pleased with it. Mainly as it was on a topic that I love and is close to my heart... Hope you all like it too Ross Is Meat Loaf Past His Sell-By Date? Ross Pomfret – 2nd October 2007 From time to time we hear of artists playing live and not having the ‘X factor’ anymore that they used to have. You maybe wondering why this has come about. Is it due to age? Health? One rock legend who has had critics all studying him is Meat Loaf, owner of Bat Out Of Hell (Rock’s Most Epic Adventure) which stayed in the charts for over 400 weeks and sold over 30 million copies. Following on with the Bat idea which remained and led to the release of Bat Out Of Hell II: Back Into Hell in 1993. A massive come back for Meat Loaf with a massive world tour. Great publicity, both for the album and the tour and from the public’s vote led him to get an award for best vocal at the Brits 1994. The following year saw the release of what was to become Bat III, the third instalment but later shelved and later was released as; Welcome to The Neighbourhood. You may be thinking why are critics complaining that he hasn’t got the power anymore? Increasingly, critics began to think this as he seemed to disappear until his next album; Couldn’t Have Said It Better which flourished onto the shop shelves like a battering ram in April of 2003. Following the release of what Meat Loaf claimed was the best album yet, vocal wise was a big World Tour allegedly to be his last. During this tour, critics began to comment on how rough he sounded on some of the shows and how good he sounded on others in the UK. This was to change, even for Meat Loaf when on 17 November 2003, Meat Loaf collapsed after quoting to the audience; “Ladies and gentlemen I apologise to you at this point in time. I've been suffering with the flu for 10 days now. I really, really wanted to come and perform for you tonight. They didn't want me to but I did and ladies and gentlemen I apologise to all of you right now. I am in no... I'm sorry, I really cannot go on, I'm terribly sorry, I love you all”. Newspaper reporters claimed that the man is past it! To prove them wrong, Meat Loaf was back on the road touring Europe despite his health. This did not escape the reporter’s eye. They were back out there to comment more about his performance. In November 2004, the mighty Loaf visited Glasgow and this was one show where the press ran wild! Boasting a career with some songs clocking in at just over 10 minutes, after all they are mini soap opera’s, and an impressive voice, the reporter’s were ready with their pens to jot down what a great concert it was to be. Within the first two songs, the press could see that this would be a concert from hell! With reference to a review from journalist; Elaine Macintyre, Meat Loaf’s voice was somewhat ‘strained as well arousing fears that he could be losing his magic touch’. Audience members announced that it was the worst show they had ever been to, he was ‘drunk, out of tune and a waste of money and is well past it’. Wait one second, you maybe thinking, is he really past it, or is that just people commenting that he is past it because they are not true Meat Loaf fans? Well, there are several accounts stating that the larger than life rock god/part time actor is well on track to hitting the high notes. October 2006 saw the release of what was the next generation in the Bat relatives; Bat Out Of Hell III: The Monster Is Loose. With a pre-tour which was announced as ‘The Bases Are Loaded Tour’ was to prove all people that Meat Loaf was not past it but instead within his best before date. Making his only 2006 UK show at London’s Royal Albert Hall, looked to be the best review since his Bat Out Of Hell II Tour back in 1993. The Mail On Sunday stated that ‘he was powerful and knew how to put on a show. His voice too was in good nick, able to hit those high notes in songs such as; I’d Do Anything for Love and Bat Out Of Hell.’ The only downside to the show, certain press articles, naming one; startled all fans by expressing ‘he is only suitable for coach parties – his panto performance and the lack in hardness to his music has toned down slightly’. Apart from the odd glitch in the 2006 UK show, Meat was back in March 2007 and was raising arena’s roofs, and therefore getting the publicity that he should be getting. The Bat was back! Critics, at last, were not complaining about how bad he was, but praising how amazing he was. The first UK gig for the tour was in Manchester. It was described by Carly from the UK Fan Site as ‘Riding the wave’, a giant wave of explosive sound, colour, spectacle and sheer excitement that lifted us up and carried us on a rushing crest of peerless rock and roll for two and a half hours. Other articles from the tour including shows at Birmingham state that the place was completely “batty” according to the Birmingham Mail which went on to say the band were in ship shape and for the voice, it couldn’t of been any better. Motoring back to the last review of Meat’s Glasgow concert, you would think, time to recover and he would be back on and firing on all cylinders. Elaine Macintyre reviews ‘having taken the stage once again after claiming his last Glasgow show was his last, he should have been better letting it lie – coming out on stage not able to sustain a note on Paradise and thinking if Meat Loaf had lost it as he was bringing back the 1977 appearance; the long hair and suit’. Just when you thought things could get worse – they didn’t! After the second half, the same person reviewed it a lot better; ‘Maybe it's because his voice has finally warmed up and given us a show that we really wanted, with numbers which contain much emotion and songs such as Blind As A Bat, a great Rock ballad’. As we come down to earth, you may still think I’m not convinced that Meat is past his sell-by date. Meat Loaf has a second profession besides being a rock artist, he’s an actor too. Many people claim that he is still a great actor and will be for a long time to come. Meat Loaf has appeared in roughly 30 films including hits such as; “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” as Eddie and in 2006 he appeared in Tenacious D: The Pick Of Destiny as Jack Black’s father. To follow this idea and success in films; he has been featured in an article by Fred Topel claims he’s “Incredibly Professional” and how on time he was compared to other artists. In other parts of Loaf’s life; he has been an influence to people besides fans. Apparently; Chemical Romance, had gone to him to ask for advise on how to do a song and how to perform it, expressing the emotions. This clearly show that whatever age you are, you can still be an influence to someone and shows that he is not yet to date, past it. Back pathing, clearly stating he is now past his music profession is the time being able to work again with old friends. Let’s face it, if he was past it, they wouldn’t work with him. It’s as simple as that. For Bat Out Of Hell III, he joined forces with old-time songwriter who wrote the first two Bat albums; Jim Steinman. Also in company was producer; Tod Rungdren, who managed to capture the first Bat Out Of Hell and capture all the emotion and transfer it to something people could hear. Beside old recruits, he has gained new friends whilst making his new album; Desmond Child joined forces to produce the album after Steinman took a back seat due to having quite a few heart attacks and strokes. This follows the idea that he must still be great to have other producers come to him and ask whether they are able to carry this larger than life project and make it something that’s similar to the other Bat albums. All in all, there is only one correct answer to this issue of whether Meat Loaf is past his sell-by date or not. The answer to it, is your own. It’s one’s opinion to decide – depending if you’re a die-hard fan or a musician that loves many genres, the correct answer lies in your heart and yours only and what you believe! To me, he will always rock my world; after all, I am one of those sad people that would spend all their money on tickets if allowed. Last edited by AndyK; 09 Oct 2007 at 21:57.

09 Oct 2007, 20:58	#3
Evil One Mega Loafer Join Date: 15.01.2007 Posts: 5,192	My head hurts.

09 Oct 2007, 21:03	#4
djfierce Mega Loafer Join Date: 15.06.2005 Location: Posts: 3,596	i know you've made it small so not to take up too much space but that really is too small for me to read all that Ross. Any chance of changing it?

10 Oct 2007, 01:25	#7
djfierce Mega Loafer Join Date: 15.06.2005 Location: Posts: 3,596	well it was certainly written by a fan lol just a small correction - 17th November when he collapsed, he collapsed during a song, came back to attempt the beginning of AFL then made his announcement of stopping the show. And even a Meat fan would have to admit that Steinman took a lot more than a back seat in bat 3.

10 Oct 2007, 02:13	#8
mszee Mega Loafer Join Date: 29.03.2006 Location: And you think you're down under??? Posts: 26,252	ok

10 Oct 2007, 11:21	#10
Deb Mega Loafer Join Date: 26.04.2003 Location: Did I say that?... Posts: 4,162	Let's just hope your teacher isn't a huge Meat fan and then you'll get away with all the factually incorrect statements lol

10 Oct 2007, 11:29	#11
meatloaf-unofficial Mega Loafer Join Date: 06.02.2006 Location: Touring the Country Posts: 2,558	what I have some factual statments that are wrong? Please tell me as I would like to know

10 Oct 2007, 12:28	#13
meatloaf-unofficial Mega Loafer Join Date: 06.02.2006 Location: Touring the Country Posts: 2,558	I see... Slight minors, but apart from that - you have to say the essay is quite good

10 Oct 2007, 12:50	#14
AndyK Relentless Join Date: 21.11.2003 Location: Over the top..... seeing what's on the other side Posts: 18,694	OK, you asked for feedback, here we go Personally speaking, I agree with Evil. A persuasive essay should be just that, an essay that presents an argument for or against a topic, in this case "Is Meat past his sell by date?". You present a series of researched facts and details which, as has been pointed out are somewhat lacking in accuracy, and then you don't draw any conclusion or put forward an argument as to why that conclusion should be the right one. Other than the fact that you think you're a sad person because ytou want to go to a number fo Meat shows ... that's hardly going to persuade anyone else to go is it? I don't know what the exact brief was for the esay, but based on the facts you've provided, which was that you had to right a persuasive essay on a topic of your choosing. I'd have failed it, but then, I'm not a teacher ... which is probably a good thing

10 Oct 2007, 13:34	#16
meatloaf-unofficial Mega Loafer Join Date: 06.02.2006 Location: Touring the Country Posts: 2,558	no I put it up as I did want feedback to see what other meaty Fans thought of it and its good... I tried to have a go at it and I must of done something right as he passed me

10 Oct 2007, 18:36	#18
Deb Mega Loafer Join Date: 26.04.2003 Location: Did I say that?... Posts: 4,162	You;ve also got the tour starting in March. Not sure if you mean here or the States, either way it's wrong. States - Feb & UK - May

10 Oct 2007, 18:43	#19
LucyK! The Monster Is Luce Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Posts: 7,547	Andy's saved me a job as I was about to say the same...I'm the geek in the class who loves art history and i'm in heaven writing an essay and I take great interest in language...if I was marking that as piece of writing I'd have given you a mark (assuming that I was an impartial teacher and not a Meat fan), but as a persuasive argument I'd have failed it. Not good writing a piece that's a mile long but doesn't cover the brief.

10 Oct 2007, 19:05	#24
meatloaf-unofficial Mega Loafer Join Date: 06.02.2006 Location: Touring the Country Posts: 2,558	well the way I was meant to say is, was he was back in March - I didn't specify where though, so I assumed you'd know the US or Canada. Though when I read from someone who isn't in my mind; I get where your coming from. Sounds like he's back in the UK in March - which is wrong! Hope that doesn't confuse people even more And I see also Lucy what you mean by the ending; you feel as if I've kinda plonked it on the end as I couldn't think of one and suppose I should of said something along the lines of; he's not past it at all and he's still a great performer and will keep performing until he physically can't.