Finally on the road to recovery.

Steve6 · 14 Dec 2009, 04:36

It's been hell for me the past couple of months. I've been able to do very little and was going through a living nightmare. Not alone the past few months but even years. However things got very bad recently and I was all over the place. I was running over to the doctors every few days. I had a racing mind, panic attacks, drivng off in my car not knowing where I was going, Binge eating, not being able to carry out one task all day, extreme levels of anxiety, mood changes every hour, my doctor said I had Bipolar but wouldn't prescribe anything until I was examined by a psychiatrist.

I was then sent to see a psychiatrist fairly urgently at the start of November, and talked everything out I don't remember much about what happend during the chat, but I was dignosed with ADHD that day which I knew nothing about, and he said I was living with it since I was very young which explains an awful lots of things I went through and felt when I was small and in recent years. Plus I had problems with substance abuse, always running away from school, and a host of many other things, and it was all caused by this ADHD. It's nearly always dignosed in children but sadly in my case it was missed, and I had to suffer till now. I'm so angry with a lot of people at the moment my parents and my school most of all.

I'm on a medication now.. a proper medication that I have no side effects from that I should have been on years ago, instead of the anti depressants, and to be honest I feel very different and it's amazing. I haven't felt certain things in years. I don't feel near as heated and I feel a bit more focused aswell. I'm still a bit snappy and aggressive somedays and have bad lapses, but the nurse said it's going to take until easter till I'm better and it will take a bit longer till I'm fully better because I've also developed anxiety disorder from it. But after years of hell and so much problems I'm getting the help I need to get my life back on track. I'm so upset though I've lost so many years, when things could have been very different for me. I have lots of potential but never achieved anything. I was never in the right frame of mind to anyway. But I'm eager to achieve things when I'm back on track. I haven't played the XBOX in years, and recently I'm obsessed with playing it, I can't get enough of it. I'm also after losing my craving for junk food too. I nearly get sick when I eat a bar, and a few months back, I had an incredible craving for sweets. Things are changing very slowly but they are changing, and at long last. I'm seeing a nurse twice a week aswell, where she sets me little tasks and helps me with things, so I'm happy with that.

RSG · 14 Dec 2009, 04:47

way to go!

amethyst · 14 Dec 2009, 10:47

Great news that you've finally been diagnosed and are getting the help you need.

Try not to focus on what you've missed out on ~ you can't change the past.... instead focus on what you can do with your future now ~ smiles.

ames xx

batcity · 15 Dec 2009, 00:44

As a person who lives with someone with Bioplar.. I do understand what you have been going through Steve.. my partner suffers from Biopler Disorder (and have has for 20 years) (hereditry I'm afraid) and when she's high where the lithuim levels have gone thru the roof and i can deal with that... I just take her credit card off her because she spends money like water and the worst of it is.. she never shuts up..

When she's low.. it's soul destroying, she says things she dont mean, she doesnt want to go out... not sleeping and just comatosed basically. you just have to be there and be strong.. sometimes I have a cried and dont know what to do because its hard on me because i work and to see her low is heartbreaking.

Steve... You'll be ok... glad you have got a cpn and are on the mend.. you have a really good christmas!!!

dottie · 30 Jan 2010, 21:20

Hope everything is going well for you now Steve.......

mszee · 30 Jan 2010, 21:29

Well, I am glad you have finally seen a psychiatrist and are on proper medication!

14 Dec 2009, 04:36	#1
Steve6 Batman Join Date: 28.11.2005 Location: Ireland Posts: 1,690	Finally on the road to recovery. It's been hell for me the past couple of months. I've been able to do very little and was going through a living nightmare. Not alone the past few months but even years. However things got very bad recently and I was all over the place. I was running over to the doctors every few days. I had a racing mind, panic attacks, drivng off in my car not knowing where I was going, Binge eating, not being able to carry out one task all day, extreme levels of anxiety, mood changes every hour, my doctor said I had Bipolar but wouldn't prescribe anything until I was examined by a psychiatrist. I was then sent to see a psychiatrist fairly urgently at the start of November, and talked everything out I don't remember much about what happend during the chat, but I was dignosed with ADHD that day which I knew nothing about, and he said I was living with it since I was very young which explains an awful lots of things I went through and felt when I was small and in recent years. Plus I had problems with substance abuse, always running away from school, and a host of many other things, and it was all caused by this ADHD. It's nearly always dignosed in children but sadly in my case it was missed, and I had to suffer till now. I'm so angry with a lot of people at the moment my parents and my school most of all. I'm on a medication now.. a proper medication that I have no side effects from that I should have been on years ago, instead of the anti depressants, and to be honest I feel very different and it's amazing. I haven't felt certain things in years. I don't feel near as heated and I feel a bit more focused aswell. I'm still a bit snappy and aggressive somedays and have bad lapses, but the nurse said it's going to take until easter till I'm better and it will take a bit longer till I'm fully better because I've also developed anxiety disorder from it. But after years of hell and so much problems I'm getting the help I need to get my life back on track. I'm so upset though I've lost so many years, when things could have been very different for me. I have lots of potential but never achieved anything. I was never in the right frame of mind to anyway. But I'm eager to achieve things when I'm back on track. I haven't played the XBOX in years, and recently I'm obsessed with playing it, I can't get enough of it. I'm also after losing my craving for junk food too. I nearly get sick when I eat a bar, and a few months back, I had an incredible craving for sweets. Things are changing very slowly but they are changing, and at long last. I'm seeing a nurse twice a week aswell, where she sets me little tasks and helps me with things, so I'm happy with that.

14 Dec 2009, 04:47	#2
RSG Mega Loafer Join Date: 27.07.2003 Location: Canada Posts: 3,296	way to go!

14 Dec 2009, 10:47	#3
amethyst I know that i'll be bad for good. Join Date: 15.11.2003 Location: South UK Posts: 893	Great news that you've finally been diagnosed and are getting the help you need. Try not to focus on what you've missed out on ~ you can't change the past.... instead focus on what you can do with your future now ~ smiles. ames xx

15 Dec 2009, 00:44	#4
batcity Guest Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Posts: 751	As a person who lives with someone with Bioplar.. I do understand what you have been going through Steve.. my partner suffers from Biopler Disorder (and have has for 20 years) (hereditry I'm afraid) and when she's high where the lithuim levels have gone thru the roof and i can deal with that... I just take her credit card off her because she spends money like water and the worst of it is.. she never shuts up.. When she's low.. it's soul destroying, she says things she dont mean, she doesnt want to go out... not sleeping and just comatosed basically. you just have to be there and be strong.. sometimes I have a cried and dont know what to do because its hard on me because i work and to see her low is heartbreaking. Steve... You'll be ok... glad you have got a cpn and are on the mend.. you have a really good christmas!!!

30 Jan 2010, 21:20	#5
dottie queen post- whore extraordinaire Join Date: 29.01.2003 Location: Still Rockin' at "72" Posts: 13,181	Hope everything is going well for you now Steve.......

30 Jan 2010, 21:29	#6
mszee Mega Loafer Join Date: 29.03.2006 Location: And you think you're down under??? Posts: 26,252	Well, I am glad you have finally seen a psychiatrist and are on proper medication!