The Church Of The Jewel In The Crown Of The Holy Sun - Page 8

L96 · 12 Jun 2006, 02:07

Tis difficult to know where to begin... Loafers, hast thee no compassion, no love for thine brethren? Thy lack of enthusiasm in assisting a fallen angel, a sister in the Loaf, is incomprehensible... 'twould be sad should ye need a helping hand in future, for none shall be forthcoming.

False idols, mocking the Loaf... why, Loafy child, would thee come into this holy place and fan the flames of disobedience? Thee is hell bent on eternal punishment and damnation, my heart is sorely saddened for thee.

Vanity, and self worship... if thee prefers thy gym to thy Loaf, then so be it, yea, though ours hearts bleed for thee both... when ye are burning in pits of sulphurous acid, do not expect a life raft nor a neutralising solution, for tis thine own headstrong behaviour and stubborn pride that has taken thee there.

L96 · 15 Jun 2006, 09:24

Loafers rejoice, for the lord Loaf and the gatekeeper of the pointed piano have risen again! Like sunshine on dewdrops, paradise is accessible via thine dashboard light, for the BabBazz has been setback, that may be temporary, nonetheless, our lord Loaf rises again, the rainbow in the sky with no rain foretells his third coming, and lo, it shalt be a great, glorious and triumphant return to his kingdom, and who amongst thee hast not longed for this day? For the Loaf is here, he walks the earth with us mortals and graces us with his presence again, rejoice in his name and through the words of the gatekeeper of the pointed piano, lift thine eyes to the heavens and give thanks and praise, look to the stars, for they foreshadow his appearance, enjoy the frostbitten chill of thine winter evening, and the joy in the sun on thine back, for hell hast frozen over, BabBazz is skating to work, and we all gather together in this great outpouring of joy to have our Loaf amongst us again, praise be!

Rob The Badger · 17 Jun 2006, 03:03

I wanna get married! With like flowers and cherubs and crap...

**The Flying Mouse** · 17 Jun 2006, 03:16

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rob The Badger

I wanna get married! With like flowers and cherubs and crap...

Anyone in mind?

Heli · 17 Jun 2006, 03:18

Can I be maid of honour Rob!!

...or flower girl ^_^

Rob The Badger · 17 Jun 2006, 03:51

Quote:

Originally Posted by THE FLYING MOUSE

Anyone in mind?

No idea...you into polygamy?

**The Flying Mouse** · 17 Jun 2006, 03:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rob The Badger

No idea...you into polygamy?

Polygamy?

*ponder*

Poly - Gamy

*ponder*

Gamy Poly

Why on earth would I have an interest in sick parrots?

mszee · 17 Jun 2006, 04:45

Me thinks this sanctuary was somewhat desecrated...

Off with your heads!!!

L96 · 17 Jun 2006, 05:58

Shalt the sign in front of the church be edited, to announce this joyous occasion of the matrimony between Rob and Heli?

May I also remind the congregation that tis considered rude to behead fellow Loafers within this sanctuary. Unless there is proof of them flirting with the insidious ways of the perfidious BabBazz, of course, that allows an exception to the rule.

Rob The Badger · 19 Jun 2006, 02:01

Me? Marry a girl? Craziness...
I guess if there are no other candidates however

mszee · 19 Jun 2006, 02:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rob The Badger

Me? Marry a girl? Craziness...
I guess if there are no other candidates however

Oh wow...we just might have a match...

Heli · 19 Jun 2006, 08:59

It's ok hun, you can have the odd affair now and again when you get bored

But then again.....I don't even want to get married

! I just want to be MoH or flower girl or something!

L96 · 19 Jun 2006, 09:35

Tis the understanding of this preacher that present are a) male wishing for matrimony, all impossibilities and impracticalities aside, and b) a female wishing to be involved somehow in matrimony.... thus there should be no confusion.

This Preacher was horrendously and remorselessly assaulted by the insidious BabBazz this very afternoon, and is leaving for a stiff Scotch. Fight out the wedding details amongst thineselves.

Rob The Badger · 21 Jun 2006, 00:51

no offers yet

mszee · 21 Jun 2006, 05:00

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rob The Badger

no offers yet

Well, Heli was not exactly against it...PLUS she said you can have affairs...you can have the best of both worlds???

Rob The Badger · 21 Jun 2006, 15:21

but she smells

mszee · 21 Jun 2006, 15:48

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rob The Badger

but she smells

Ahem...judging from your avatar...ummm...hmmmm...

Heli · 21 Jun 2006, 17:30

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rob The Badger

but she smells

byatch!

L96 · 21 Jun 2006, 21:36

Quote:

Originally Posted by Heli

byatch!

Language! Tis a church thee are in, not an alehouse. Should thee truly feel the need to emphasise thine statements, thee shalt use the only word allowed under the rulerdom of the Loaf, and that word tis the mighty Fcuk, for our lord Loaf applies that description and request frequently.

mszee · 21 Jun 2006, 21:55

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lotus96

Language! Tis a church thee are in, not an alehouse. Should thee truly feel the need to emphasise thine statements, thee shalt use the only word allowed under the rulerdom of the Loaf, and that word tis the mighty Fcuk, for our lord Loaf applies that description and request frequently.

FCUK is a very good word...

L96 · 21 Jun 2006, 22:20

Quote:

Originally Posted by mszee

FCUK is a very good word...

And one wholeheartedly endorsed by the lord Loaf himself, thus 'tis permissible, nay, encouraged in a place of worship.

Rockette · 22 Jun 2006, 05:14

The preacher has returned! Where's you bin?

L96 · 23 Jun 2006, 19:15

Oh, the insidious BabBazz, how perfidious and sneaky are it's ways. This most humble and modest of Preachers was today listening to the word of the Loaf and the gatekeeper of the pointed piano, taking courage from the thought of the Loaf and the gatekeeper, allowing this mind to relax from torment, and cherishing in this heart the one true way and light and life, and thinking of all the joy and happiness the Loaf and the gatekeeper of the pointed piano have brought to mineself and others in their quest for perfection... when LO! Suddenly, suddenly, suddenly, in the midst of this deep meditation.... there it was... the tremendous howlings of the Bab, corrupting and defiling the words of the gatekeeper of the pointed piano, scaring the children and just alike, terrifying the immortal and leading the evil to cheer her to even great heights of desecration. Fear not, brethren in the Loaf, for the Preacher has screamed "THE EVIL ONE! BEGONE IN THE NAME OF THE LOAF" and thrown the modern recording device across the length of the manufacturing plant. Rest assured, brethren, the Preacher cannot suffer for this indescretion, for the Loaf in his love and in preparation for the third coming protects this most humble of Preachers, as do religious persecution laws. Thus, was the infidel BabBazz defeated in it's sly and tricky ways, so Loafers, take heed, and be on thine guard, for the BabBazz would not attempt these tricks unless the third coming was at hand. Be warned, brethren, and be aware. Be very aware indeed.

Rockette · 24 Jun 2006, 09:12

And when is this third coming foretold, O enlightened preacher?

L96 · 24 Jun 2006, 22:15

Darest thee call thineself a Loafer??? Pah. As ye should well be aware, sometime between the 23rd and 31st of October.

AND DON'T THEE FORGET IT!

17 Jun 2006, 03:18	#180
Heli Daddy's little internet junkie Join Date: 29.01.2004 Location: Grimsby Posts: 4,596	Can I be maid of honour Rob!! ...or flower girl ^_^ Last edited by Heli; 17 Jun 2006 at 03:42.

12 Jun 2006, 02:07	#176
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	Tis difficult to know where to begin... Loafers, hast thee no compassion, no love for thine brethren? Thy lack of enthusiasm in assisting a fallen angel, a sister in the Loaf, is incomprehensible... 'twould be sad should ye need a helping hand in future, for none shall be forthcoming. False idols, mocking the Loaf... why, Loafy child, would thee come into this holy place and fan the flames of disobedience? Thee is hell bent on eternal punishment and damnation, my heart is sorely saddened for thee. Vanity, and self worship... if thee prefers thy gym to thy Loaf, then so be it, yea, though ours hearts bleed for thee both... when ye are burning in pits of sulphurous acid, do not expect a life raft nor a neutralising solution, for tis thine own headstrong behaviour and stubborn pride that has taken thee there.

15 Jun 2006, 09:24	#177
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	Loafers rejoice, for the lord Loaf and the gatekeeper of the pointed piano have risen again! Like sunshine on dewdrops, paradise is accessible via thine dashboard light, for the BabBazz has been setback, that may be temporary, nonetheless, our lord Loaf rises again, the rainbow in the sky with no rain foretells his third coming, and lo, it shalt be a great, glorious and triumphant return to his kingdom, and who amongst thee hast not longed for this day? For the Loaf is here, he walks the earth with us mortals and graces us with his presence again, rejoice in his name and through the words of the gatekeeper of the pointed piano, lift thine eyes to the heavens and give thanks and praise, look to the stars, for they foreshadow his appearance, enjoy the frostbitten chill of thine winter evening, and the joy in the sun on thine back, for hell hast frozen over, BabBazz is skating to work, and we all gather together in this great outpouring of joy to have our Loaf amongst us again, praise be!

17 Jun 2006, 03:03	#178
Rob The Badger Too sexy for this post Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Manchester, UK Posts: 2,895	I wanna get married! With like flowers and cherubs and crap...

17 Jun 2006, 04:45	#183
mszee Mega Loafer Join Date: 28.03.2006 Location: And you think you're down under??? Posts: 26,252	Me thinks this sanctuary was somewhat desecrated... Off with your heads!!!

17 Jun 2006, 05:58	#184
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	Shalt the sign in front of the church be edited, to announce this joyous occasion of the matrimony between Rob and Heli? May I also remind the congregation that tis considered rude to behead fellow Loafers within this sanctuary. Unless there is proof of them flirting with the insidious ways of the perfidious BabBazz, of course, that allows an exception to the rule.

19 Jun 2006, 02:01	#185
Rob The Badger Too sexy for this post Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Manchester, UK Posts: 2,895	Me? Marry a girl? Craziness... I guess if there are no other candidates however

19 Jun 2006, 08:59	#187
Heli Daddy's little internet junkie Join Date: 29.01.2004 Location: Grimsby Posts: 4,596	It's ok hun, you can have the odd affair now and again when you get bored But then again.....I don't even want to get married ! I just want to be MoH or flower girl or something!

19 Jun 2006, 09:35	#188
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	Tis the understanding of this preacher that present are a) male wishing for matrimony, all impossibilities and impracticalities aside, and b) a female wishing to be involved somehow in matrimony.... thus there should be no confusion. This Preacher was horrendously and remorselessly assaulted by the insidious BabBazz this very afternoon, and is leaving for a stiff Scotch. Fight out the wedding details amongst thineselves.

21 Jun 2006, 00:51	#189
Rob The Badger Too sexy for this post Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Manchester, UK Posts: 2,895	no offers yet

21 Jun 2006, 15:21	#191
Rob The Badger Too sexy for this post Join Date: 14.04.2002 Location: Manchester, UK Posts: 2,895	but she smells

22 Jun 2006, 05:14	#197
Rockette Mega Loafer Join Date: 10.06.2005 Location: I think! Posts: 4,805	The preacher has returned! Where's you bin?

23 Jun 2006, 19:15	#198
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	Oh, the insidious BabBazz, how perfidious and sneaky are it's ways. This most humble and modest of Preachers was today listening to the word of the Loaf and the gatekeeper of the pointed piano, taking courage from the thought of the Loaf and the gatekeeper, allowing this mind to relax from torment, and cherishing in this heart the one true way and light and life, and thinking of all the joy and happiness the Loaf and the gatekeeper of the pointed piano have brought to mineself and others in their quest for perfection... when LO! Suddenly, suddenly, suddenly, in the midst of this deep meditation.... there it was... the tremendous howlings of the Bab, corrupting and defiling the words of the gatekeeper of the pointed piano, scaring the children and just alike, terrifying the immortal and leading the evil to cheer her to even great heights of desecration. Fear not, brethren in the Loaf, for the Preacher has screamed "THE EVIL ONE! BEGONE IN THE NAME OF THE LOAF" and thrown the modern recording device across the length of the manufacturing plant. Rest assured, brethren, the Preacher cannot suffer for this indescretion, for the Loaf in his love and in preparation for the third coming protects this most humble of Preachers, as do religious persecution laws. Thus, was the infidel BabBazz defeated in it's sly and tricky ways, so Loafers, take heed, and be on thine guard, for the BabBazz would not attempt these tricks unless the third coming was at hand. Be warned, brethren, and be aware. Be very aware indeed.

24 Jun 2006, 09:12	#199
Rockette Mega Loafer Join Date: 10.06.2005 Location: I think! Posts: 4,805	And when is this third coming foretold, O enlightened preacher?

24 Jun 2006, 22:15	#200
L96 Inaugural goldfish winner Join Date: 04.07.2005 Location: In a handbasket. Believe me, for someone my height, it's hell... Posts: 2,373	Darest thee call thineself a Loafer??? Pah. As ye should well be aware, sometime between the 23rd and 31st of October. AND DON'T THEE FORGET IT!